Missing: Part Deux
by Ghost Zero
Summary: The sequel to the fic Missing. The roles are reversed and the girls have to save the Man Force from Diddy! Please R & R!
1. Lights, Camera, Action!

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

A/N: All right folks, this first chapter isn't at all involved in with the story. I just saw this on Family Guy and thought it would be a funny way to start off the story. And as for the entrances some of the rangers have, most of those were inspired by several WWE superstars(surprised?). Well enjoy!

The scene is at Graumen's Chinese Theather, where the entire media is outside. Cameras are flashing, reporters are interviewing people, and fans are eagering awaiting the arrival of the stars of this event. What is this event you ask? The premiere of some blockbuster movie? Nope. It's the World Premiere of the new story Missing: Part Deux! The screen goes to a booth positioned at the top of a tower next to red carpet. It is set up so that the people in the booth can look down on the carpet. Inside the booth are our hosts for this event, Goldar and Lothor. Both of them have on tuxdeos and Lothor is wearing a giant top hat. He is also downing a several glasses of Whisky.

"Welcome you worthless humans! I am Goldar and this my co-anchor Lothor!" Goldar says. Rather than greet the fans, Lothor simply raises his glass in the direction of the camera. "We're here tonight at the event of the day, the World Premiere of Missing: Part Deux! And it appears that some of the rangers have arrived!"

The screen then flips to the runway were the Mystic Force rangers have arrived. Nick, Xander, and Chip all haveon tuxedos while Udonna, Clare, Vida, and Madison all have on dresses. However, they all still have there wristbands, capes, vests, and boots from thier Mystic Uniforms on.

Next was Bridge, who was with walking with his date for the evening, Z. Or rather they were being pulled, as they sat on a chariot of toast that was being pulled by Jack and Omega. Apparently they lost some sort of bet.

The song "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred begins playing. Boom and Piggy appear from nowhere and roll a red carpet on top of the one already there. Phineas, Bulk, Skull, and Toby ( who, along with Piggy and Boom, will be known as the Nobodies) appear and start snapping pictures as Syd, Sky, and Conner come down the red carpet. Sky and Conner have on tight jeans, bow ties with no shirts, shades, and large fur coats. Both of them have blonde highlights in there hair and are unusually greesy. Syd is dressed, well, really skanky. Rather than walking, Conner and Sky are eroticlly dancing down the carpet as Syd rubs there abs until they enter the theater.The screen then flips back to Goldar and Lothor.

"Was that supposed to be sexy?" Lothor asked with a disgusted look on his face

Goldar respnded "I think so. But in any case, I have word that our next ranger is approaching. Cassidy?"

"Goldar, I've just recieved word that Bradley Brothers are appproaching the arena. In fact, here they come now!"

Blake and Hunter then tear down the runway on their motorcycles dressed in tuxedos with shades and red and blue headbands. Tori is sitting in a sidecar attached to Blake's cycle and is wearing a gown with a set of goggles on her head. They are speeding down the carpet not bothering to stop for anyone or anything in the way. Because of this, Devin and Cassidy are forced to jump out of the way. Just as Devin and Cassidy were about to regain there composure, Ethan comes down the carpet on one of the motorcycles from the movie Tron., leaving a trail of blue light.

"Voodoo Child" by Jimi Hendrix begans playing as Dustin and Shane come down the carpet dressed in tuxs with red and yellow feahter boas, shades, and weightbelts with Hulkamania written on the back. Half way down the carpet they stop and play some air guitar before doing various Hulk Hogan like poses. Just like when there idol is performing, people used this time to go to the bathroom.

"Go Green Ranger" begins playing as a morphed Cam comes down the carpet, waving to the people and brandishing Tommy's Dragon Dagger. The screen then quickly flips to Goldar and Lothor.

"Wow, I didn't know Tommy could still use that morpher." Goldar said.

"That ain't Tommy. That's my ungrateful nephew, Cam." Lothor said betwenn sips. At hearing this, Goldar's eyes became the size of tires. The sound of a dragon screming was then heard in the distance.

"Run for cover!" Goldar yelled as eveyone except Cam quickly took his advice. Moments later, the Dragonzord appeared and unleashed a flurry of missles on the unsuspecting Cam. The music stops and Dragonzord uses its enourmus claws to pick up the dagger and stomped it's way back to its hiding stop. Hunter and Blake came back around on thier bikes and scooped him up on a stretcher and take him into the theater.

"Is it gone?" Lothor asked as he hid behind the desk.

"Yeah. It don't take to kindly to people touching that dagger. I remember the first time I was ordered to touch that damned thing."

Flashback: Angel Grove

Goldar is standing in front of the rangers holding the Dragon Dagger in his hand.

"What will you do now that I have your weapon, Green Ranger? Hahahahah!" he said

"Aw man! He has my dagger!" after Tommy said this, a dragon's roar was heard. Everyone looked confused until the Dragonzord appeared and stomped Goldar flat. Then the Zord peeled the squished Goldar off his foot and returned the dagger to Tommy.

"Thanks big guy!" Tommy said as he petted his zord. The zord began rolling on its back and kicking its leg as Tommy petted it.

End Flashback

"Yeah those were good times." Goldar said with a smile.

"Anyway, I think we got some more rangers coming. Marah, who's down there?" Lothor said slightly slurring a bit.

"Marah? Who the hell is that?" a confused Cassidy asked.

"I mean, ah, Cassidy. Yeah that's her name, Cassidy." Lothor said as he took yet another sip.

"Well I just heard that a few of the Wild Force rangers have arrived!" Cassidy said as Cole and Alyssa walked down the red carpet. Both of them have on matching red and white Vera Wang gowns.

The Super Mario Bros. theme starts playing as Merrick and Shayla walk down the carpet. Merrick is dressed in a grey version of Mario's suit. Shayla is wearing a pink dress like Peach. She is also carrying Max, who is dressed like a blue Toad. Merrick is also pulling Danny on a leash, because he dressed like a black Yoshi.

"Metalingus" by Alter Bridge begins playing. Eric comes down the carpet dressed in a pair red and black flame pants, a long black coat, a pair of shades, a blonde wig, a fake goatie, and a bowtie. He is with Taylor, who is dressed in a similar fashion to Syd. Halfway down the carpet, Eric and Taylor begin making out in the most disgusting way possible.

"Get a room!" Lothor yelled down to them

"Hey! Screw you buddy!" Eric said as he summoned his Quatnam Defender. He then randomly shot at the tower, hitting Goldar in the wing.

"Why you little...AH!" Goldar tryed to fly down and attack Eric, but due to the fact that his wing was injured, he simply fell to the ground. Eric and Taylor laughed at the griffin-man and entered the theater.

As the medics helped Goldar back to the tower and fixed his wing, two blue racecars zoomed down the runway. From them emerged TJ and Lucas, who were excorted by Cassie and Nadria. Both men were dressed in blue racer suits with matching helmets. Both have on blue jackets with "Blue Racers" written on them. TJ's is written in red, while Lucas's is in white They also have on scarfs that match the text on the jackets. TJ is also has on a pair of dark goggles, and a large red X across his chest. Apparently he's going for the whole Racer X look. Nadria and Cassie both have on pink versions of TJ and Lucas' outfits, only minus the helmets. Suddenly, Lucas's trunk pops open revealing Trip and Circuit. Both are wearing green and white versions of of the overall jumpsuits worn by Speed Racer's younger brother. The six of them then enter the theater.

Moments later a long red limo, with the word "Collins" emblazoned on the side, came down the carpet. The door opened and Wes and Jen emerged. Wes is clothed in a tux with an incongriously large red cowboy hat perched on his head; while Jen is wearing a pink gown. For some unexplained reason she has a large, disugsting, mole on her face. The mole in many ways is like a car wreck; a gruesome sight that you don't want to see, yet you can't look away from it.

The two giant ladder arms of the Lightspeed Megazord came down in the middle of the carpet. Chad, Dana, and Carter are all in the hands, while Joel is standing midway up ladder waving to the people. Kelsey then slides down the ladder on her rollerblades, effectively knocking down everyone in the process. After dusting themselves off, the Lightspeed rangers entered the theater.

All the lights dimmed as "Slow Chemical" by Finger Eleven plays. Ryan appears at the end of the carpet wearing a pair of black leather pants, a form fitting tanktop, a trenchcoat, and a large widebrim hat. All the black in his clothing makes him seem very pale. He doesn't walk, but seems to floats above the carpet down to the entrance of the theater.Just before he enters the theater, he removes his hat and rolls his eyes back in his head. His head is shaking so badly everyone is sure he was having a seizure of some sort. He then walked into theater.

Back at the announcers booth, Lothor is so drunk he can barely sit up straight and Goldar has his injured wing in a sling.

"So Goldar, you gonea tell mes and da peepel bout sum a yer adventurs win you waz workin fer dat Rita chick?" Lothor said in his druken in a drunken slurr.

"Um, what?" Goldar questioned.

"He asked if your going to tell them about some of your adventures while working for Rita." Sensei, who for some reason was still in hamster form, said. How he got there was a mystery to all.

"Ah! A talking hamster!" Goldar screamed. He swatted Sensei far into the distance with his sword. "Well since you asked, I'll tell you an interesting little tidbit that just came to mind."

"Wel out wit et den!" Lothor sputtered out.

Goldar stared blanky at Lothor "Anyway, did you know Tommy was never hired to be the green ranger?"

"Ya dunt saye." Lothor tossed his bottle of Jack Daniels into the crowd, injuring a small group of people . He then started on another bottle.

"Well, originally Rita wanted Tommy to be her quote "Boy-Toy" and Squatt was going to be the Green Ranger. But after me and Scorpina did some quick talking and convincing, she decided to give the power to Tommy. That boy-toy role was filled by Finster."

Lothor began vomitting wildly. It wasn't clear if his violent vomitting was caused by the fact that he was so drunk or the thought of Finster being Rita's "Boy-Toy". Perhaps it would be better to turn our attention to the sky where our next group of Rangers will be arriving.

The B.A.S.S. came souring threw the sky and crashed into the red carpet, completly destroying the three cars parked there.

"NO!" Lucas and TJ screamed in unison. "She was the only thing I'll ever love!" both said as they mourned the loss of there cars, much to the dismay of Cassie and Nadria.

From out of B.A.S.S. came Andross, Karone, Ashley, Zhane, and the lost Galasxy rangers, with the exception of Leo. They all start waving to the crowd and smiling.

"Hm, where's Leo?" TJ asked

"No idea. He said he wanted to come in with his 'new best friend'." Mike said. Just after he said this, Leo and Rocky start making there way down the runway. Both have on red warm up pants, no shirts, white bath robes, and red headbands with there names in white lettering. For some reason both of them have there hair colored blonde and are doing dances that they consider sexy, but to everyone else they just look stupid.

"Boom" by P.O.D. plays as a man wearing black and green leather pants and matching mask hopes from under the red carpet amisdt a flurry of sparks. Everyone assumes it is Rey Mysterio, but it is actually Carlos.

As soon as Carlos was in the theater, Justin swings down from a rope dressed like a pirate. He pulls out his sword and began swinging it at random people in the crowd before going inside.

Next was Zack, who entered wearing a black and purple military uniform. The Nobodies also have on the same outfit. They are all doing dances that haven't been popular since Zack's time as a ranger. Halfway down the carpet, they do a dance that can best be described as a mixture of the The Robotand Riverdance.

The sensible rangers (anyone who hasn't entered yet with the exception of Jason and Tommy) come down the carpet wearing tuxs and dresses of there color. They wave to the crowd and have on huge smiles. The screen then flips to the announcer's booth.

"Well, that was bland." Goldar said.

"Yooo cun saye dat agin." Lothor slurred.

Goldar looked at his co-anchor. "After this, you are going straight to AA. Wait a second, I have word that we have a zord approaching the theater."

Jason's Dragonzord comes to theater already in warrior form. It is carrying a huge TV screen. He placed it down and returned to wherever he came from. The theme from "2001, A Space Oddessey" begins playing and the TV begins showing Jason's many highlights as a Power Ranger. As this is going on, Michael Buffer walks in the middle of the carpet with a micraphone.

He began "Ladies and Gentlemen, I introduce to you, the first and therefore best Red Ranger in history, Jason Lee Scott!"

A large amount of sparks go off as Jason makes his way down the carpet. He is wearing a red robe with golden trim that comes to the floor. It is so long that the Nobodies must carry the tail end. Some of the younger rangers were in awe, but most of the rangers that knew Jason were not. Just as Jason took the mic from Buffer, Tommy's Brachiozord appeared. It had a TV four times the size of the one used by Jason on it's back. It used it's head like a crane to drop the TV down on top of Jason's, easily crushing it.Then the Red Super Zeo Zord appeared carrying something that was much taller than the zord itself. Whatever it was was covered by a huge black sheet.

Jason tryed to speak into the mic, but to no avail. Apparently someone had his mic cut off. The large TV then began playing a movie that was being narrated by the guy who does the NFL Yearbooks. The video was off all the Power Rangers defeating there enemies in battle.

The narration began, "Since there beginning, the Power Rangers have been pillars of strentgh and power. There bravery and valor has been well documented throughout time. And though most rangers have very little in common, they all share one trait; all of them have been defeated in battle." the video then switched to the rangers getting defeated and losing battles. "All rangers have suffered this fate but one. And that one is King Tommy Oliver." Red Super Zeo then took the sheet off to reveal a giant statue of Tommy in his white ranger suit. Along with his statue were the statues of the Trini and Kim clutching Tommy's legs. There were also statues of Billy and Zack bowing down to Tommy's statue. And to top it off, Tommy's statue is standing on a statue of Jason's defeated body.

"Yes, King Oliver is by far the best ranger in the history of history. He's done things other rangers can only dream about doing. He killed a giant monster without a zord, something no other ranger has done .He killed a monster without morphing. He killed one thousand monsters at the same time in his Turbo days. He once defeated a megazord without a zord. And he also stood on his zord many times, as opposed to sitting inside like the other, less cool rangers." the video screen began showing footage of these deeds.

"Man, that is so made up." Jason said as he and the other rangers looked on.

"What makes you say that?" Cole asked.

"Well, TJ was the one that killed a thousand monsters, Eric destroyed a giant monster without a zord before Tommy did, he didn't defeat the Megazord, he didn't morph to kill the monster because it had a stroke before the battle could begin, and the reason he always standing on the zords is because he's afraid of cramped spaces." Jason said bitterly

The video then stopped. The red carpet got wider and from seemingly nowhere, a choir appeared. They began singing "Number One" by Nelly. Tommy's white tiger zord came walking down the carpet with a throne on top of it's head. Sitting in the throne was Tommy. He had on a tux, shades, and a long white fur coat. Every one of his fingers was decorated with a platnium ring and a platnium crown sat atop his head. He has a replica of the World Heavyweight Title with his name engraved on it around his waist. He is also carrying a jewel studded staff with him.

The zord stopped and Tommy hopped down from his throne. As soon as he was down, he threw his arms in the air as a large fireworks display goes off. The display is large enough to set a small country on fire. He then made his way toward the carpet, waving to his many fan-boys and groupies along the way. He finally enters the theater and the others follow suit.

"Well it looks like all of our rangers have made it inside. Guess that means our night is over." Goldar said.

"Eh Goldar, yus wana goo hit a coupla baaz?" Lothor asked.

"No way! Your drunk enough as it is, and if I'm not home in twenty minutes Scorpina is gonna make me sleep on the porch."

"Wow, she dunt even leet ya sleep on da cuch?"

"Naw, she says I always get my fur on it. But anyway, that's the end of our show folks! For Lothor, Devin, and Cassidy, I'm Goldar saying g'night everybody."

A/N: Well folks, that was the first chapter off this story. Just like I knew it would, it really got my creative juices flowing. So, the next chapter will be the first actuall chapter of this story.


	2. Oh Boy

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

Greetings to all! As the narrator of this here story, I figure I should fill you people in on what's happened in between the end of Missing and the beginning of Missing: Part Deux. Starting off, Xander Bly was recently arrested and jailed for sexual harassment. I have my team of high priced lawyers working around the clock to try and free him. As a sign of support, some of the rangers have chosen to wear "Free Xander" t-shirts. In more green ranger news, Joel Rawlings and his wife Angela Fairweather-Rawlings recently divorced. Because of this, Joel went into deep depression and started a daily ritual of eating 9 tubs of lime sherbet. Amazingly, he gained no weight. He did, however, gain an addiction to the ice cream and now crys like a baby whenever he hears any love song. In other news, when it came time to sign contracts for the story, Wes demanded alot of money. His exact words were "I wanna be paid as much as Tommy and Jason put together and then doubled!" Of course, I said no. He then decided he wasn't going to sign the contract I offered him. So until we can work out a deal, the role of Wes will be played by his future twin Alex.

After being told that he should "overhaul his life" by his doctor, Tommy decided to let loose and decided to ask out Hayley. He also tryed to hook back up with Kim and Kat for good measure. Needless to say, all of them shot him down. Ashamed and broken, Tommy ran into the montains of Stone Canyon, vowing only to reappear for the annual red ranger picnic. He lived off of the land for several months, living with bears and other wild animals. He even started callig himself Grizzly Oliver. But after some time in the mountains, he returned to Reefside dawning long unkept hair and and a filthy beard. When I asked him to clean up for production, he said "I cannot remove the filth, for now it is my only love." After hearing this, I knew drastic measures needed to be taken. So, I had Jason and Rocky beat him about the head with baseball bats until he was knocked out. I then had Katie drag him into the shower and wash him. There's a good chance she took advantage of him during this time, but that is unimportant.

Over the break my lawyers have been working overtime. They recently had to get TJ out of a jam when he was arressted in Briarwood. Apparently, he went to a clothing store to get some t-shirts. However, the smallest size the store had was a men's medium. And as we all know, TJ can't wear a shirt that's a size bigger than a woman's small. When the clerk suggested that he try something that would fit him, he went insane and beat the man half to death with the cash register. He then ran from the store and was involved in a low speed chase that lasted several hours and went threw five states.

In a strange twist of events, Nick is now the son of Carter and Dana. With there relationship on the rocks, Carter and Dana decided to have a child to save the magic. But Dana quickly decided she wasn't going threw labor. So, the next best thing was adopting. They then concluded that they should adopt a ranger. They thought Nick was the clear choice since he's an orphan. However, Nick isn't an orphan, he's emancipated and doesn't live with his parents. But the judge was an idiot and gave them parental rights even though Nick is legally his own guardian. So once again, Nick is forced to live with two unfit parents. He's currently try to get emancipated a second time, but it doesn't look like it'll work.

Well I think that's about it. So without any further ado, let the story begin!

The final battle with Prince had just ended and all the rangers (with the exception of Jack) were high in spirits until Syd noticed something.

"Hey guys, what's that?" she said pointing to the sky. As usuall, no one payed her any attention.

Shane continued talking as if he hadn't heard her "Well guys, I guess we can all go-AH!" Shane's scream was because the other male rangers were sucked into a giant fortress shaped like a P.

"Yeah, yeah it's your boy P. Diddy!" a voice from inside the fortress said. "I took your men to make them into my new hip hop boy band take that. If you want them back, come and get them from me. Bad Boy baby!" the fortress then took off into space

"Not again." Trini said as she shook his head.

"Look on the brightside," Jen began. "At least Kelsey got sucked in with Ryan"

"Well, let's go get em." Taylor said as she and the others headed toward B.A.S.S.

"Wait a second." everyone turned around to Vida "Why should we go get them right now? I mean, they were bullshitting around when it was time to get us." she had a good point

"Better yet, why should we get them at all?" Aisha asked.

"But who would be our red, black, green, and grey rangers?" Alyssa asked.

"Who needs em? They had there little 'Man Force', I say we have our own all female team!" Kendrix said.

"Sounds good to me. All in favor say 'aye'" Taylor said. A collective aye followed.

"I officially dub us, Power Rangers: Chick Force!" Jen said proudly. "And as our first order of business, I say we go and find those men! not becuase we need them, but to prove we can do it faster than they did!"

"Sounds like a plan. But first, I think we should stock back up on supplies and what not. I'm sure those morons used up most of the stuff that was there." Dana said. All the others nodded in agreement and headed for different stores.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

The Man Force landed in a giant cage inside this new fortress. The first thing they noticed was that there morphers were gone. The next thing they notcied was that they were in a cage. Of course, all of them tryed to escape. Cole climbed to the top of the cage and tryed biting threw the bars. Cam, Hunter, Blake, and Shane tryed to knock the bars down by using Dustin's head as a ram. Carter started shooting the bars, no even noticing that the blast were bouncing off of them. It was then that someone actually started thinking. Jack(now recovered from the incident with Katie) used his powers to phase threw the bars. But as soon as he got to the other side, they heard someone opening the door. Jack quickly hid, trying to get the upper hand on whoever it was.

After the door opened, in came a man. He was dark skinned, had a mohawk and a pair of really big lips. He wore a Sean John sweatsuit and a pair of very dark shades. After staring at them for a moment, he spoke.

"How are you doing rangers? I'm sure I don't need an introduction since you know who I am." the man said. No one seemed to know "Well then try guessing."

"Jay-Z?" Conner asked.

"No."

"50 Cent?" Wes offered.

"Hell no."

"Wes your so stupid. You have to say it like this. _Who is _ 50 Cent. You gotta say it like your on that show with Alex Trebeck." Eric said

"That's wrong too"

"Master P?" Carter tryed.

"Try again."

Rocky appeared to be in deep thought. "I know! Your Michael Jackson"

"Where the hell did you get that idea? I mean, I'm a great rap artist."

"No wonder. None of us really listen to rap that much." Rocky said. "But I think Zack might know!"

"You think Zack might know what?" Zack asked. He hadn't been paying the situation that much attention. He was too busy enjoying his liver sandwich.

"You know who this guy is?" Jason asked him

Zack looked at the man long and hard. "I think that's Flavor Flav."

"NO! I'm none of those people! I'm Diddy! As in P. Diddy! As in the CEO of Bad Boy Records! I'm a super rich music mogul for Pete's sake!" Diddy said angerly.

"Guess you not as popular as you think." Trent said with a shrug.

"Anyway, the reason I've brought you here is to have you form a boy band. With this boy band, I will make millions." Diddy said.

Just then, Jack jumped from his hiding spot.

"Freeze bastard! Let my partners out of that cage!" Jack said. The way he was talking, you would think he had a weapon of some sort.

"Cage? Oh! I forgot ya'll was in there." Diddy then pressed a button on his watch, which opened the cage. "Now I'm going to leave you be. I'll be back in a little while. If you need anything, just ask Mr. McWando."

"Who or what is a Mr. McWando?" Adam asked.

"Him." Diddy said pointing to a koala bear that was standing behind them. He is dressed like a butler and is roughly the height of Sky. It should also be noted that McWando has a bicycle style moustache. Just the way he was staring at them made everyone a little uneasy.

"That koala makes me really uncomfortable." Blake said.

"I think he's kinda cute." Cole said with a smile.

Location: the outskirts of Large Generic City II

All of the girls have regrouped after getting snacks, clothes, and other things vital for the trip.

"Alrighty, let's move out!" Taylor said as she ushered everyone to the ship.

"Wait, Syd's not back yet." Z said.

"Well then where is she?" Taylor then looked around. "Come to think of it, where are the other pinks?"

"That's a good question. I guess we better go look for them." Katie said as she and the others entered the city.

After almost 20 minutes of looking, they stumbled upon a store called The Pink Palace. Inside, all of the pink rangers running around, buying everything from pink brushes to pink paperweights. Even Cassie, Dana, Kendrix, Jen, and Vida had given in to something I like to call the "pinkness".

"So this is where they went." Tori said calmly.

"They should really be ashamed of themselves." Kira said shaking her head

"We should be ashamed, but we're not." Karone said as she kicked a woman in the chest to take her pink curtains.

The most interesting sight of this place was a pink fur coat on display in the center of the store. Standing on either side of the display were Syd and Kim, eyes locked on each other and the coat. The two stood in an unholy staredown for 5 long minutes before both pulled out there morphers. Both of them morphed and started fighting. The was intense, and in mere moments they had beaten each other so badly that they both demorphed. Somehow the fight made it outside near a large puddle of mud.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

Everyone was sitting around talking when Justin ran to a large computer screen. He then began pressing several buttons.

"Justin, what are you doing?" Adam asked.

"They're having a catfight! I gotta get a live feed!" Justin said. After a few more seconds of pressing buttons, had Syd and Kim's fight on the big screen attached to the computer. "I got it!"

Within seconds, all of Man Force was huddled around the screen. All of them tryed to get as close as possible. It was to the point that Max jumped on Sky's back to get a better view. Even Kelsey was entranced by the sight.

"This is awesome." Rocky said.

"Aw man! They fell in the mud!" Tommy yelled as Syd and Kim fell in the puddle of mud.

"Look! Z and Aisha are trying to break it up!" Ethan said. Everyone's eyes shoot over to Z and Aisha, but quickly went to just Aisha as Danny gave them the look of an overprotective father.

"The other girls just jumped in too! I think there trying to break it up!" Chip said.

At this point everyone was so into it that they didn't even blink.

"What the hell is that?" it was then that Sky noticed Max on his back. Or rather he felt Max. "Gross! Get off me!"

"Sorry. I tend to get kinda excited easily." Max said threw blushing

After a few more minutes it was over. All of the men broke there stares.

Carlos lifted his mask and wiped the sweat off his face. "That was friggin hot." Carlos said

"You can say that again." Mike said as he lit a cigar.

"That was...odd." Kelsey said. She then whispered something in Ryan's ear. Whatever it was, it made Ryan's eyes the size of eggs.

Ryan ran up to McWando and whispered a question in his ear. The koala bear then pointed toward a set of doors. Ryan ran threw the doors with Kelsey on his shoulder. Moments later, the sounds of Ryan and Kelsey "wrestling" filled the entire fortress.

"Wow." Chad said in shock. "Go Ryan!"

"I remember when me and Angela used to do that." Joel said sadly. He then broke down in tears.

"Get a hold of yourself man! You didn't see me crying when Kim and Kat dumped me: Tommy yelled.

"At least I didn't run away to the mountains!" Joel shot back. Tommy simply hung his head in shame.

"You see son, this is why you don't get too attached to women." Eric said to Sky

"Trust me, I don't think..." Sky was cut off as Ryan came bursting back into the room, dressed in a pair of grey boxers, black chaps, black cowboy boats, a dog collar, and one of those masks with the zippers over the eyes and mouth. He unzipped his mouth and whispered something to McWando. McWando nodded and left the room. It was then that he noticed the others staring at him.

"Um, haha, ...how bout them Cowboys?" Ryan stuttered out. Everyone continued staring. "See, me and Kelsey like to..."

"NO!" the others(minus Max) yelled in unison. The last thing they needed was a visual for this scene. McWando then returned with a bucket of coffee creamer. Ryan tasted the creamer, nodded, and returned to Kelsey.

"Hey Justin, can you get me feed of what they're doing?" Max asked. Everyone's gaze turned to him. "What?"

Diddy then entered the room.

"I'm glad you already got this screen set on those girl rangers. I sent somebody to fight them so they don't come here to mess up my plans. Let's watch shall we?"

Location: Large Generic City II

Kim and Syd had been seperated, and due to a quick spell from Madison, all of the girls were clean once again.

"Hehe, now that they're distracted, I can have the coat for myself!" Jen said as she snuck her way back into the store. As she went into the store, she saw that the coat was gone. "Where'd that coat go?"

"I got it lil mama." Jen went outside to find the voice. When outside she saw a man. He was brown skinned and was wearing the coat, a pair of blue jeans, a pair of pink Timbaland boots, two oversized yellow diamond earrings, and had on a pink fur hat.

"Who are you?" Jen asked. It seemed that the man caught the attention of the other rangers too.

"Well I'll ya fam, the people call me Killa Cam." the man rapped.

"Killer Cam?" Tori said confused.

"His names Cam'ron. He's a guy that thinks he can rap. As you can see, he can't." Vida explained.

"Look up in my ears and you can see these Lemonheads, keep on dissing me and I'm gone leave ya bloody red." Cam'ron said with a scowl.

"Aren't you part of that group of wanna be rappers?" Tanya asked.

"Who you callin' a wanna be? Later you'll be callin' me. You tryin' to say that Dipset's wack, well where the hell's your platnium plague?" Cam'ron shot back

Tanya's eyes filled with tears. Seconds later, she broke down crying on Katherine's shoulder. "I'm a failure!" she wailed

"What else is new?" Katherine muttered. Since Tanya was so close to her, she heard this and started crying louder.

"I'll get to the nitty gritty man, I was sent by Diddy man. He told me to come kick your ass, so he can go and make the cash." Cam'ron said

"You actually think you can take us? We are Power Rangers after all." Syd said.

"You think I don't know ya'll do? Hell, I can do it too!"

Trini's eyes widened "Don't tell me you can..."

"Ninja Storm, Ranger Form!" a flash of pink light surrounded Cam'ron has he became the pink Ninja Storm ranger.

All of the rangers stared wide eyed at the newly morphed Cam'rom. Unlike Jason Mraz's pink Wild Force suit, this one was clearly made for a woman since it featured a skirt. And for some odd reason, Cam'ron was standing in a very femine manner.

"Seriously man, where the hell do you people get these morphers?" Cassie asked.

"I don't know about those other nigs, but I got mine from a guinea pig." Cam'ron said. Torrie simply shoke her head.

Cam'ron pulled out a pink staff and charged the rangers. As one woud expect, the rangers all morphed and swiftly handed him ass.

"Still think you can take us?" Ashley asked.

"I'll show you ain't I done cause I'll pull out the big gun!" Cam'ron pressed a button on his morpher. Then, a giant pink bird zord appeared. It then started changing into the form of a warrior. This zord was literally bigger than of the megazords used by the rangers.

"Holy crap! How are we suppose to fight that thing?" Aisha asked.

"No clue." Alyssa said.

The rangers ran from the attacks of the zord until they got back to B.A.S.S. They all hid behind the zord to formulate a plan.

"Think of something! Your suppose to be smart!" Jen said looking at Trini, Kat, and Kendrix.

"We're on it." Kendrix said as the three of them got into a small huddle. Moments later, they were done. "We've got nothing."

"Oh! Use this to beat him!" Maya said as she gave Taylor a shotgun like blaster.

"Maya, where have you been?" Kendrix asked.

"I went to go get a funnel cake." Maya said as she bit into her treat.

Taylor began reading the label on the gun. "Amazing Demorphing Blaster. Demorphs any ranger and dismisses any zord in one shot. Fires two shots only" she then turned to Maya. "Where did you get this?"

"It came with the funnel cake." Maya answered.

Taylor shrugged and shot the blaster at Cam'rom's zord, instantly dismissing it. She then blasted him with the last shot to demorph him.

"Ninja Storm, Ranger Form!" Cam'ron said. But oddly, he didn't morph.

"I guess it demorphs people for good" Alyssa said.

Cam'ron nervously looked at the rangers before running off.

"He still has the coat! Get him!" Syd yelled as she and Kim gave chase.

Just then, Ms. Fairweather stuck he head out of one of the B.A.W.

"Um, could we come outside?" she asked kindly.

"No! All non-rangers are to stay on the ship!" Taylor snapped.

"That's stupid. It's not like we're animals or something." Hayley said.

"Get back in that damn ship!" Taylor said as she took Trini's Blade Blaster and aimed it at the B.A.W. Hayley sighed deeply as she and the other non-rangers went insdie.

"Well I guess we can leave now." Kira said.

"I wish we could, but we have to wait for Kim and Syd to get back." Jen said

"Can't we leave them? I mean, who would miss them?" Vida asked

"I wish we could leave them. God knows I wish we could leave them. But that's just not the Chick Force way. Were going to have to sit and wait for them." Taylor said.

"Well can we at least go inside the ship?" Alyssa asked.

"Fraid not. Not the Chick Force way." Taylor said.

"We really need to work on this 'Chick Force' way." Kira said.

"Taylor" Alyssa said, her tone very serious "I'm tired. I need my rest."

Taylor's eyes then got very wide. "Okay then, everybody on the ship!" she franticlly said.

"Would made you switch gears like that?" Katie asked.

"Ever wonder how Alyssa can be so nice?" Taylor asked. Katie nodded. "Well, it's because she gets her sleep. And lot's of it. And if she doesn't get her sleep, well let's just say bad things happen. Horrible, terrible, tragic things."

"Bad things like what?"

"Well, let's say something happened one night when Max tryed to wake her up. Something that involved him going to the ER with a battle axe down his throat." Taylor said as she and the others went on the ship.

A/N: Well, I think I'll end this chapter here. Seeing as I have nothing better to do at this hour, I'll probally start the next chapter. As always, please review!


	3. Locked Up

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

When last left off, the Chick Force had just found victory in there first battle against Cam'ron, the guys were introduced to Diddy's koala bear butler Mr. McWando, and Ryan and Kelsey were having some fun with some creamer and leather. Now let's take a look at what Xander is doing shall we?

Location: The moon

On the moon was a huge prison where all Power Rangers villians are held in custody. Some believe that these villians are destroyed, but they are really just in jail. Here is where Xander is being imprisoned. The judge thought it would be funny to put a ranger in a prison full of monsters( for the record, the judge was Zedd.)

Xander sat in the cafeteria, trying to eat his meatloaf(at least they told him it was meatloaf.). Ever since he got here everyone was staring at him and shooting him dirty looks. He had only made two "friends" since he got here, and they were Wedding Org and the blue Psycho Ranger. Well, they weren't really friends, but they were the only two monsters that didn't call him Ranger Scum. But then again, he hadn't met all of the monsters yet. Just as Xander was starting to enjoy his meal, one of the guards appraoched him.

"You Xander Bly?" the guard asked.

"Uh, yeah. That's me alright.." Xander said nervously.

"Warden wants to talk to you."

"Oh ok."

The guard then excorted Xander to the Warden's office.

"Say, who is the warden anyway." Xander asked.

"I am." Ransik said as Xander entered the office.

"Aren't you that Rancid guy?" Xander asked.

"It's Ransik. Anyway, we'll start once I finish my lunch." Ransik said as he began eating lunch.

His lunch consisted of a bowl of Easy Mac, a bag of onion rings, a mango, some pudding, a can of Red Bull, and a cigar.

"That was tasty. Now just wait for this game to end and we can start talking." Ransik said. He then began watching a baseball game between the Royals and the Pirates that had just started.

Between not getting to finish lunch and the horrible baseball that was on the TV, Xander found himself slipping in and out of consciousness. Finally, the game ended in a 0-0 tie. The teams were so horrible that they couldn't score a run between them. The refs decided to call it a tie because it was already the 50th inning no one could score.

"That's some quality baseball right there. They play baseball over in Ireland?" Ransik asked.

"Can't say. I've never been there." Xander said

"But ain't you from there?" Ransik asked

"Um, I'm Austrailian." Xander said.

"Oh. Are you from the same part as Schwarzenegger?"

"I think he's from Austria."

"Ah yes, Austria. Home of the Tigers. They have this great football game every year against Alabama."

"I'm pretty sure your thinking about Auburn."

"Auburn, Austria, Austrailia, what's the damn difference? There all stupid foreign countries that can't hold a candle to Old Glory." Ransik said as he admired the large flag in his office. "Join me in singing the Star Spanpled Banner."

Ransik then forced Xander to his feet and began singing the Star Bangled Banner. He was loud and very off key. He even made a point ot sing the song 52 times, once for every state.(Xander tryed to tell him that Mexico and Canada weren't states, but he wouldn't listen.)

"And the home, of the...free!" Ransik sang as he wiped a tear from his eye.

"Doesn't it go 'And the home of the brave'?" Xander asked.

"You tryin to tell me how to sing MY national anthem you damn communist! With your damn boomerangs, and your clogs, and your damn furry hats, and your breadsticks, and your damn man-skirts, and your damn tea!" Ransik said as he began choking Xander.

"I'm American you dick!" Xander choked out. Ransik then dropped him.

"What happened to your accent?"

"I don't have one. I'm not even from Austrailia. I'm from Boston."

"Then why did you act like an Aussie?"

"Because when I first got to Briarwood, I heard that Hugh Jackman was in town signing autographs and such. So I went to get one, and Madison, Chip, and Vida ended up in line in front of me. That's when I heard Maddie say that she liked his accent. So, I decided that acting Austrailian would better my chances with her."

"You did all that for some girl."

"Yep. I'd kill a thousand and one kittens if it would please her." Xander said with stars in his eyes.

"Wait a sec, you said your from Boston right?"

"Yeah."

"So..."Ransik then slowly pulled out a New York Yankees hat and placed it one his head. "How bout them Yankees?"

Xander's eyes seemed to catch fire when he saw the hat. He pulled out a Boston Red Sox hat and put it on. He and Ransik then argued about baseball for the next couple of hours.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

Ryan and Kelsey had concluded there little excapade, and now Ryan was rolling dice in the corner with Jack, Eric, and Hunter. Hunter has on one of those red plastic visors and Jack has on a shirt that says "We in the Money!". Diddy then entered the room.

"Okay guys, we're going to..." he then noticed the men in the corner. "You guys shooting craps over there?"

"Yeah." Jack said over his shoulder.

"Mind if I join in?" Diddy asked

"Sure." Jack said as Diddy went the corner with them.

"This dude is loaded! If we can beat him, we can get an assload of money!" Hunter whispered to Jack.

"Damn skippy! We're going to suck this guy dry!" Jack and Hunter exchanged a quick nod before starting another game.

Location: B.A.S.S.

"How did your chase go?" Z asked

"He got away." Kim said sadly as she and Syd entered the ship

"I really wanted that coat." Syd said in near tears.

"Cheer up. From what I understand, we should be a close to the planet of Malltopia." Fairweather said

"Malltopia? Isn't that the planet where there are like a million malls?" Karone asked.

"Yep. I heard they have a mall the size of Africa. And that's the smallest one there." Cassie said.

Marah, Kapri, Aisha, Syd, and Kim were now drooling at the thought of this Malltopia.

"Well since you two are back, we can take off." Taylor said.

Just then, someone started pounding on the hatch of the ship.

"We're not home!" Ashley chimed. Of course, this didn't stop the knocking. "Gosh, didn't I say we're not here?"

"People don't magiclly stop knocking when you say that." Cassie said

"Well it's getting kinda annoying." Ashley whined.

"We don't want any!" Cassie yelled. "That should about cover it."

Now it sounded like the person was kicking the hatch.

"All right dammit!" Kat yelled as she went to open the hatch. There she found Charlie standing outside.

"Are you going back our time any time soon?" she asked.

"Um, in a few days after we finish this mission we will. Why? And how did you get out of that card?" Kat asked

"I kinda need a lift back home. If you let me in, I'll tell how I got here and about that party you guys missed." Charlie said

"Deal. Come on in." Kat said as she ushered Charlie in.

Location: Prison on the moon

Xander and Ransik had finally finished talking about baseball, and now Ransik was ready to get down to business.

"So, what did you want to see me about?" Ransik asked.

"You called me down here." said Xander, who is now using his accent again.

"Oh yeah! I did you call you down here. Tell me, are you aware of the fact that I have a daughter?" Xander nodded towards Ransik question. "Good. Are you also aware of her boyfriend Lucas?"

"Yeah I know him." Xander said

"Good. I need you to seperate them. I rather dislike Luke."

"Lucas." Xander corrected

"Luke, Lucas, Lance, whatever. Anyway I don't like that guy, and I really want them to break up. Not only do I want them seperate, I want her to start dating that green alien guy. What's his name again?"

"Trip?" Xander asked.

"Yeah that's him. I thought it was Fall. Anyway, I'm willing to let you out of here if you can get them to break up."

"How exactly would I go about that?" Xander asked.

"I don't care if what you have to do. Cast a spell, put Lucas in a cage, lock Trip and Nadria in a closet until they fall in love. I don't care if you have to kill Lucas to do it, I just want it done. Are we clear?"

"Crystal clear."

"Good. Now let's shake on it." Rnasik and Xandert shoke hands. There was then a long moment of silence.

"So..." Xander said as he slid the Red Sox hat off his head and then slid a New England Patriots hat on his head. "How bout them Pats?"

Ransik's pulled out a New York Jets hat and put it on his head. The two then began arguing about football for the remainder of the day.

A/N: I'm going to end this chapter now cause I'm rather tired.and review!


	4. Untitled

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

A/N: I have no idea what the names of the A-Squad rangers other than Charlie. Hell, I don't even know if they have names. So, I just made them up. Rick is green, Chris is yellow, Laura is pink, and Bruno is blue. And the boyband breakdown Diddy does later on is really just something I came up with from watching WAY to much N Sync videos with my cousin. Anyway, let's begin.

When we last left off, Jack, Hunter, Ryan, Eric, and Diddy were roling some dice, Xander and Ransik struck a deal to get Xander out of jail, and Charlie had just joined up with the Chick Force. We'll start this chapter by seeing how Hunter and Jack's plan to take all of Diddy's money is going.

All of the men are still in the corner with the exception of Ryan and Eric. But now, Diddy has a large pile of money, jewelery, and clothing that belonged to Jack and Hunter. The only thing the four of them had left were there boxers and socks.

"I told you this was a bad idea!" Hunter hissed at Jack

"No you didn't!" Jack snapped back.

"That's not important now. What matters now is that we need to win our money back." Hunter said.

"Ok, I'm done." Diddy said as he stood up and gathered his winnings.

Jack and Hunter sat there with their mouths wide open.

"Well, there goes out clothes and money." Hunter said

"This is all your fault!" Jack said to Cole. Confused and hurt, Cole ran in a corner and started crying.

"All right. I'm going to start grooming you guys for the band in a little while. Let McWando know when your ready and he'll escort you to my film room." Diddy said

"Man, I really need some pants." Hunter said sadly.

Location: B.A.S.S.

All of the rangers are gathered in the living room area of the ship where Charlie is about to tell her story.

"Gather round cause I don't feel like talking loud and I'm going to repeat myself." Charlie said. The crew all scooted closer to her so they could here.

"Okay, for some random reason, Doggie decided to throw a party at SPD headquarters. Doggie and just about everyone else were drunk off there asses. THe only sober people were the people that were in containment. So that Sam kid wanders down into the containment wing and walks up to our cell. He started asking us all of kind of stupid questions and what not. After about two hours we decided to see if he would free us. Since he's like and 9 and happened to be drunk at the time, we easily convinced him to release us. So me and the rest of A Squad sneak our way down to where the party is going on."

"Get to the exciting part." Karone whined.

Charlie grabbed a nearby coffee mug and hurled it at Karone, much to the amusemnet of the others. "Don't interrupt me again. Anyways, we figured that with everybody being drunk, we could escape from the base completely. But we needed a distraction. That's when Rick came up with his best idea ever."

Location: SPD Headquarters(flashback. But since it's the future would it be a flashfoward? Never mind.)

Everyone in the base are yelling and stumbling about. Doggie and Sgt. Silverback are standing near the punch bowl, holding a conversation.

"So which Simpson is hotter, Ashlee or Jessica?" Doggie slurred

"Um, I think Lisa was hotter than both of em." Silverback said

"Yeah, Lisa was a babe."

As Doggie and Silverback held their conversation, Rick was busy explaining his plan to the ofter A-Squaders.

"Okay, here's the plan. Chris, can you still sound like Doggie?" Chris nodded. "Good, now I'll go over there and throw my voice to make it sound like Silverback is talking. I need you to do the same for Doggie. Just say stuff that would provoke them into a fight. Now let's go."

"Wait a damn minute, what about us?" Charlie asked.

"Just start chanting "fight" over and over. That'll get em going. Come on Chris!"

Rick and Chris crawled under the where Doggie and Silverback are "talking". Rick said something about Doggie being gay and Chris added something about Silverback having an STD. It was on from there. Both started yelling at each other and moved to the center of the room. Moments later, both were shirtless and beating each other brutally with there elbows. During all the excitement, the A-Squad managed to escape.

Location: B.A.S.S.

"So we got us a time machine and headed back to this time. Not exactlly sure how, but I ended up on this planent alone. So I figured you guys could help me get back home." Charlie said

"Well, since you are a ranger, I guess you can come with us. What do you think Taylor?" Jen said.

"Quite frankly, I don't give a damn. I just wanna hurry up and take off." Taylor said from the cockpit of the ship.

"Looks like your in." Jen said. "Hey Karone, when are those jackets gonna be done.?"

"Um, maybe another three hours or so. But I'll start working on them in the morning because I'm kinda tired." Karone said

Just like Charlie before her, Jen hurled a mug at Karone. Sadly, Karone didn't duck this time and the mug connected with her head. "I don't care how tired you are! I want those jackets done!" she screamed.

"If you want them so bad, do it your damn selves." Karone said. Everyone was silent for a moment before laughing insanely at Karone. "Screw all of you!" Karone yelled as she ran into her room crying.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

The entire Man Force were in a giant movie theater-like room with Diddy.

"Okay listen up. With the help of this slideshow I'm going to break down whats going to be required for this here boyband. Now we're going to go by the formula patented by boyband legends like N Sync, the Backstreet Boys, and New Kids on the Block. Now first..." Diddy stopped as the door opened and McWando entered.

McWando opened his mouth and let out a sound similar to that of a sheep. To everyone's shock, Diddy understood his koala butler.

"Send him in then." Diddy said. McWando left the room and returned with Cam'ron. "So tell me Cam, did you manage to take care of those rangers?"

"No." Cam'ron said.

"Well did you at least slow them down?"

"Not really. But I did get this coat!" Cam'ron said with a smile.

Diddy shoke his head and dismissed Cam'ron with a wave of his hand. "McWando, where are they now?" Diddy asked. McWando answered him. "What? They're already nearing Malltopia! I need to hurry up and send someone to stop them." Diddy said.

He then whispered something into McWando's ear. The bear nodded and left the room.

"Now where was I? Aw yes!" Diddiy said "Most boybands have 5 members, all of which that fit a certain mold. There's the leader, who's normally the one all the 13 year old girls come to see and does about 60 percent of the solo singing. He's the best singer, dancer, and best looking. Or at least what the fans are suppose to think. Then we have the number two. He's just a dumbed down version of the leader. He does the 40 percent of solo singing that the leader doesn't. We then have the "badass". He's the one that trys his hardest to seem tough, even though he probally still has his mom read him betime stories. But if you ask his 13 year old fan girls, he can kick anyone's ass. Next is the rugged guy. He lacks the traditional boyband look and often times looks about 5 to 7 years older than everyone else. And lastly we have the nobody of the group. He is often the last to be mentioned and doesn't have anything unique about him. Sometimes people will even forget his name. But oddly enough, he tends to garner alot of fans." Diddy said

"So who's going to be who in this band?" Adam said in a very worried way. He had a sneaky feeling that he was going to the nobody of the group

"I've yet to decide. But I can assure you that you won't be in it. I want to get that teenage demographic." Diddy said. Adam sighed a sigh of relief.

'That's too bad. Hey guys, remember when we had our band?" Rocky asked. Billy, Tommy, Adam, and Jason all nodded.

"You guys had a band?" Conner asked.

"Yeah. During our Zeo days we had a hair metal band. Zack was our manager I still have a picture." Tommy said as he pulled out the picture. It show Tommy, Jason, Billy, Adam, and Rocky with really long hair, makeup, spandex, and everything else required for a hair band. From the instruments they were holding you could tell that Rocky was the drummer, Jason and Adam were guitarists, Billy played the bass, and Tommy was the frontman. It also showed Zack in a black suit next to the band.

"Too bad it never worked out." Zack said.

"Wait, weren't you rangers in like the 90s?" Trent asked. They nodded. "And didn't hair metal die in like '91?"

"Maybe thats why we never sold a single copy of that CD." Jason said thoughtfully.

Location: B.A.S.S.

All of the girls(with the exception of Karone) were sitting in the living room area watching Carmen San Diego and singing the theme song very loudly.

"Dude, I miss this show!" Kapri said

"You can say that again. I remember one time I had a test on the seven continents, so I watch this whole night before and aced the test!" Kelsey said

They were so compelled in talking that they didn't notice the half drunk, half spoiled, half skanky, hotel heiress standing behind them. Out of everyone, it was Shayla that noticed the women first. She stared for a long time, wondering if the she would move. Apparently the woman had the same thing in mind since she was staring at Shayla. Finally, Shayla broke the silence.

"Um, can I help you?" Shayla asked.

"Yeah, where are the Power Rangers?" she asked. At hearing this, everyone turned and looked at the girl like she had just sprouted 3 heads. Then it must've hit her "Oh! Are you guys the Power Rangers?" everyone nodded very slowly.

"Are you like, lost or somethine?" Kim asked.

"No. My boss asked to me to come take care of you guys." the girl said.

"And do you have name?" Hayley asked like she was speaking to a little child.

"Paris."

"Paris Hilton right?" Syd asked. Paris nodded.

"How exactly did you know that?" Trini asked

"We spoiled rich kids stick together." Syd said. Her and Pairs then flashed a crazy looking gang sign.

"Anyways, let's hurry up and get this done with. Wishbone is coming on soon." Katie said.

"Ok." Paris said.

"Well aren't you going to morph like the others?" Dana asked.

"I'm not a ranger, but I can still defeat you!"

"Well see about that." Cassie said as she and the others morphed. They then charged at her.

30 minutes later.

Luckily, Paris only had one attack. Sadly, that attack was singing classic love songs in the worst way possible. Her current track is "If Everyone Cared" by Nickelback.

"I can't take this anymore!" Tanya yelled in frustation. She and the other rangers were now huddled behind a couch.

"I think my ears are bleeding!" Kira said.

"We're going to have to surrender." Z said.

"You right." Jen said sadly. She then grabbed Alyssa and started waving her like a flag. Paris stopped singing.

"We're willing to talk this out." Taylor yelled.

"Okay" Paris answered.

"Is there something we can bribe you with?" Taylor asked.

"Um, can I have this cape?" Paris said pointing to a large pink cape with golden trim.

"Hell no! I just bought it!" Vida said

Everyone was quiet for a moment before Aisha spoke up. "All you want is the cape?"

"Yep"

Everyone walked over to the cape and took it off the the couch it was laying on.

"No! Not the cape! I was going to add it to my suit!" Vida begged.

"Sorry kid, it's gotta go." Dana said.

"Maddie, please stop them! See? I even found a blue one for you." Vida said holding out a blue cape like hers. Vida, realizing that her sister probally wasn't going to side with her, then put on her puppy dog eyes. Before Madison could say something, the door that lead to the bedrooms flew of the hinges. And standing in the doorway was none other than Karone

But Karone was not her normal self. No no, she was once again dressed in her old Astronema getup. The only difference was now that her outfit is now decorated with splashes of pink and her hair style for the the day was a rainbow colored afro.

"My God, where did you get that awful do?" Paris said refering to Karone's hair. Karone pulled her Wrath Staff and shot a beam of pink energy at Paris causing her to fly out of a nearby B.A.W.

"My cape!" Vida said as she grabbed her new cape. " I would never let them take you away."

"Good to see you Karone. What's the progress on those jackets?" Jen asked.

"It you want your jackets so bad, make them yourselves!" Karone said. "I'm no one's servant."

"Well look you decided to get some heart." Charlie said. Karone responded by zapping her with an electric beam from her staff. This, of course, shocked everyone.

"No that I have your attention, I want to make something clear. I WILL get my respect! I am still one of the most evil, sinister, and downright mean people in history. Now you can either start showing me a little respect, or you can end up like those two. Am I understood?" everyone was silent. "I SAID AM I UNDERSTOOD?" Karone repeated as she shott a pink beam into the ceiling. Everyone feel to the floor and started nodding. Karone smiled sweetly before leaving.

"Well that was unexpected." Trini said as she and the others stood up.

"This is all your fault!" Katherine said to Maya. She, much like Cole, ran into a corner and began crying.

A/N: End of this chapter. Next chapter, Diddy decides on band members, Xander meets "The Guards", and the girls arrive at Malltopia.


	5. Money

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

A/N: To avoid confusion, I am author and I only speak during author notes like this one. The narrator is a character all his own. Meant to put that in earlier, just forgot. I also forgot to mention that I left an error in the last chapter on purpose. If you spot it, let me know in a review. It's kinda blatant, but then it kinda isn't.

The scene is a large office that was similar to the one used by Tony Montana in Scarface. On the walls are pictures of the different Power Ranger girls and pennants from different sports teams. Sitting in the office chairs/throne while enjoying a bowl vanilla ice cream and Frosted Flakes is yours truly. Sitting on the other side of my desk is Wes and his agent, the most hated man in football, Drew Rosenhous.

I put my bowl down and turn to the two men. "Okay, this is what we're willing to offer." I said as I slid them a sheet of paper with an amount of money scribbled on it. Rosenhous looks at it and throws it away.

"Listen guy, Wes is the most popular rangers of all time! I mean, the general public loves this guy! When they turn there TVs on Time Force, they tune in to see Wes. Not the amazon or that guy with the lime hair. Wes is by far the greatest ranger to ever morph! Men, women, children, animals, all of them want a piece of this guy!" Rosenhous ranted.

I stared at the two of them for a second before pressing a button on my desk. Moments later, Rosenhous falls threw a trap door positioned under his chair.

"Now listen up Collins. You are not the most popular ranger of all time. You weren't even the most popular ranger on your show. Hell, you weren't even the most popular _red_ ranger on your series. Now Alex has been filling your role, and with the dye job and me not giving him any lines, people can barely tell the difference. With that said, I'm going to give you a choice; sign this contract, or be replaced."

"I don't care if that knock off takes my place!" Wes shouted.

"Even if he gets a love scene with Jen?"

"Where exactly do I sign?" Wes said as he took a pen from the cup on my desk.

"I knew you would see things my way. Now for my next order of business. Carla?" I said as I buzzed my secretary.

"Yes?"

"Send in Alex please."

"Okay, Alex is coming up now"

Alex entered my office and took a seat next to Wes.

"Okay Alex, Wes just signed a contract to reprise his role as himself. Of course that means I no longer need you in this story."

"B-but what am I going to do?" Alex asked. He turned to Wes. "This is your fault! Why must you always take the things I hold dear? First my appearence, then my job, then my love, now my role!"

"First off, Wes is older than you, so technically you took his appearence. Secondly, Wes didn't take your job, it was given to him. Thirdly, he didn't take Jen, she came to him. And lastly, the role of Wes was his role to begin with." I said. Alex's eyes teared up and he broke down crying on the floor. Once again, I pressed a button my desk and he fell threw a trap door.

"What's down there anyway?" Wes asked

"Lions, tigers, bears..."

"Oh my!"

"Yeah. It probally doesn't help that I haven't fed them in a while. Now go down to the set while I start this chapter."

"Okay!"

Okay, now that that's out of the way, let's review what happened last time. Astronema made her return, Diddy broke down the particlaurs of a boy band, and the girls met up with Paris Hilton. Now let's see what's going on with Xander.

Location: Prison on the moon

The entire cafeteria is in a uproar because Child Collerctor Org and The Hate Master were fighting. Apparently they were fighting over who had the most obvisous name. Just as the fight was getting good, Goldar, Scorpina, and Rito appeared. Goldar was wearing a long grey coat, a skull cap with something in japanese written on it, and a pair of black pants. He also has a large scar in the middle of his face. Rito looked alot bulkier than he normally did (perhaps he's on HGH or steroids). And Scorpina's left arm appeared to be limp, and she had a patch on her right eye.

Goldar pulls out his sword and started beating Hate Master with it. Rito and Scorpina then assaulted Child Collector Org with a pair of staffs. They then turned the two monsters over to the guards

"Who are they?" Xander asked Loki, who was postitioned to his left. As he said this everyone slowly moved away from him. Goldar and crew then walked up to him.

"Did you just ask who we are?" Goldar asked. Xander nodded. "Well my stupid little ranger, we are the Elite Prison Guards."

"I kinda figured that much. I kinda meant who you guys were, like name wise." everyone in the crowd let out a gasp.

"You mean to tell me you don't know him? He is the great and mighty Goldar ya know? He was the first evil villain genereal ya know?" Rito said

"LEGENDARY." Scorpina said.

"Yeah, he's a legend! In fact, I bet Goldar could take you ya know?"

Goldar quickly shook his head no.

"TIRED." Scorpina said

"Yeah that's it! He's just real tired from taking care of those goons ya know? But if he was well rested with a ful stomach, he'd kick your ass ya know?"

"Tell me kid, you ever heard of this ranger named Jason?" Goldar asked

"Yeah, I know him." Xander said.

"Yeah, me and that chicken wuss had some battles. He was just a hater though. He tryed to stand in the way of me and my romantic dream." Goldar said as he waved his sword in a circular motion.

"Yeah, Goldar totally owned that lamer ya know?"

"Xander Bly." one of the guards said.

"That's me."

"Your free to go. Warden Ransik has a ship ready for you to go."

Xander quickly went to his room to gather his things.

"Yeah, that guy was scared of me." Goldar said

"But then again, everyone's afraid of you ya know?"

"...SUSHI?" Scorpina asked.

"I can get down with that." Goldar said.

"Yeah I could really go for a spicy tuna roll ya know?" Rito said.

Location: Malltopia

The girls had just landed on the planent and they already drooling.

"Hey Trini, wanna go..." Kim began

"I think I'll go catch a movie or go to Sharper Image or something." Trini said as she quickly walked away. The others soon followed, leaving Kim, Aisha, Katherine, Tanya, Ashley, Marah, Kapri, and Syd by themselves.

"So, shall we?" Katherine asked. The others nodded and headed towards one of the biggest mall in view.

The first store they entered was a large clothing store. After all of them gather the things they wanted they entered the line with Kim in the front.

"That'll be 203 dollars and 41 cents." the clerk said. Kim dug into her purse and retrieved the money. "Sorry ma'am. We don't accept Earth money."

"Well kind of money do you accpet?" she asked

"We only take money from here in Malltopia."

"Well do you take Earth checks?" Tanya asked as she pulled out her check book.

"Or at least Earth credit cards." Syd said as she pulled out her credit card.

"Fraid not ma'am."

"Tell me you accept ex-villianess credits. You have to accept ex-villianess credits!" Marah said.

"I wish I could ma'am. But it's against policy."

The group of sad woman walked back to the B.A.S.S. It was then that they noticed a wealthy looking man staring at the ship. Ashley then had a great idea. She walked over to the man and ushered the others to follow her.

"Excuse me sir," she said in her nicest tone. "Would you be interested in buying that big ass spaceship?"

Location: Diddy's Fortress.

Zack gathered Justin, Max, the Ninja Storm, Dino Thunder(except Tommy), SPD, and Mystic Force rangers. All of them were given Flashdance-like attire to practice the dance moves Diddy gave them. Speaking of the Diddy, he and the other rangers sat on the sidelines to watch.

Suddenly, a shiver went down Andross' spine.

"What was that for?" Carlos asked.

"I don't know. I just have a really bad feeling." Andross said.

Just then, Zhane stopped as if he had sensed something. Then, in exactly one second, he was morphed and flew threw a wall on his Galaxy Glider.

"McWando, patch that up." Diddy said. McWando left the room and returned wearing a toolbelt and hard hat. He then took some boards and started boarding up the hole.

"Man, that's kinda cheap." Danny said.

"Yeah, Prince had doves." Kelsey said

"Man, it hurts me to see that poor koala get worked like that." Cole said in near tears.

"Well that's too bad nature boy. He's my koala." Diddy said

"So Diddy, who you planning to put in this band of yours?" Jason asked.

"I dunno. After this I'll probally have them try there hands at singing. After that, I'll have them act out classic broadway musicals." Diddy said

"How exactly is that going to help you figure out who will make a good boy band?" Adam asked.

"It won't, I just like seeing young people act out broadway musicals." Diddy said.

Location: Malltopia

Trini and the rest of the girls are making there way back to the B.A.S.S., all of them many shopping bags in hand.

"Karone..." Kendrix began

"Atrosnema..." Karone growled.

"Sorry, Atrosnema. I wanna thank you again for getting us the money. I mean, if you didn't pull your staff on that guy at the bank, we wouldn't have any money to shop with." Kendrix said

"Don't mention it." Karone said.

"Hey Trini, why did you run away when Kim asked you to come shopping with her?" Madison asked.

"When kim goes into malls, bad things tend to happen." Trini said

"When did this start?" Jen asked

"Well I'll tell you. It's a story that takes place in far away place called Angel Grove and in a far distant era called the 90s."

Location: Angel Grove(flashback)

_Zack, Jason, and myself came home from the Peace Confernces for a little break. So after meeting up with everyone, we decided to go to the mall. So we there for like, two hours having fun and enjoying ourselves. Until Kim decided to go into Banana Republic. She, Aisha, Rocky, and Tommy wnet in while the rest of us got a bite to eat at the food court. Then we heard Kim screaming..._

Adam, Jason, Zack, Billy, and Trini all ran into the store and took fighting stances. When inside, they saw a livid Kim yelling in the store.

"Kim, let's just go girl. You don't need to cause a scene." Aisha pleaded.

"Hell no! That bastard just short changed me!" Kim said.

"No I didn't!" the clerk insisted.

"Come on Kim. People are starting to stare." Tommy said.

"I don't give a damn!" Kim screamed. "And your my boyfriend! You should be defending my honor!"

"But Kim..."

"Beat him up! Beat this guy up or else!" Kim said

"Or else what?"

"Or else I'll tell them about _that_!" Kim said

"Well if you tell them about _that_, I'll tell them about **that**!" Tommy shot back.

"Fine! I already told Aisha and Trini about **that**, and knowing those two, they probally already told everyone else."

"Dammit.." Tommy said.

"Now beat him up!"

Tommy slowly made his way up to the clerk. "I'm sorry about this bro, but I gotta do this." Tommy then proceeded to pummel the guy into a bloody pulp.

"What do you know," Kim said. "The guy didn't short change me."

"You mean to tell me I just beat up this guy for no reason?" Tommy asked

"I hate to but in, but when did you tell me about **that**?" Trini asked.

"And when did you tell me for that matter?" Aisha asked.

"What a damn minute, you never told them!" Tommy screamed.

"Eh he, oops." Kim said

"Oops my ass!" Tommy screamed.

"No don't go saying anything you'll regret."

"I'm telling them about **that!**" Tommy said

"No! If you do, I'll tell about _that_."

"I don't care anymore!" Tommy screamed. "Kim has 25 nipples!"

"Ewwwwww!" was the colective response from the others. Luckily, everyone else left the store when the arguement started.

"Well, Tommy has a tail! A scalely one, like a lizard would have!" Kim responded

"Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" was the response again.

Location: Malltopia

"Ewwwwww!" everyone with the exception of Hayley, Trini, and Kira said. Some were even vomitting on the ground.

"Kira, how can that not gross you out?" Tori asked

"I already knew about it. One day Dr. O tryed to fight a monster by himelf without morphing. That monster not only punished him, but it ripped his tail off and wore it like a headband."

As they got closer to there target, they slowly began to realize something was missing. That something was the ship.

"Syd, what happened to the ship?" Z asked. Syd and the other rangers all had about 300 bags a piece.

"Um, pirate ghosts stole it?" Syd said.

"Pirate ghosts? What do you think this is, an episode of Scooby Doo?" Hayley asked.

"I use to love that show!" Alyssa said.

"Me too! Who was your favorite monster?" Tanya asked.

"I liked the Miner Forty Niner." Alyssa said.

"Me too!" Tanya said

"Hey! This isn't the time to chat about cartoons dammit! What happened to my brothers ship?" Karone said

All of the guilty girls looked at other

"Somebody start with some answers!" Karone said as she started brandishing her wrath Staff.

"Okay! We sold it to this rich guy so we could have money to spend." Katherine admitted. "But it was her idea" she said pointing to Ashley.

"Yeah, her fault." the girls said in unison.

"Can this get any worse?" Kira groaned.

"I got some bad news guys." Taylor said. "I think I see one of Diddy's goons coming."

"Oh boy." Jen said. "Didn't we leave our morphers on the ship."

"Yep. I guess it can get worse." Kira grumbled.

A/N: Okay folks, that's the end of that chapter. It might be a while before my next update, so enjoy this chapter. Don't forget to tip your waitresses, and please review!


	6. Back For The First Time

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers or any of the people mentioned in this fic.

When we last joined everyone, Xander was introduced to Goldar, Scorpina, and Rito, the girls made it to Malltopia, and Ashley sold the B.A.S.S. for mall dollars. Now let's pick up where we left off with the girls shall we?

The girls all noticed the man in blue jeans and a pink jacket-vest walking towards them. Naturally, they assumed it was Cam'ron. And since they were morpherless, the girls knew that fighting him would be stupid.

"Ash, where's this guy you sold the ship too?" Karone asked.

"Probally at his house."

"Well where the hell is his house?" Trini asked.

"Um, I think it's by the mall." Syd said. Everyone slowly turned to her. "What?"

"You don't find anything wrong with that answer?" Madison asked.

"No. Why should I?" Syd said. It was clear that she was really confused.

"Don't worry about it." Jen said as she began rubbing her temples in frustration. "Look, we'll just have to find him, because there is no way I'm going to fight that guy un morphed. Come on." she said as she and the others snuck into the city to look for the man that bought the ship.

The girls were correct when they said the man in pink was a ranger. They were, however, wrong about his idenity. The man was the untalented pink Ninja Storm ranger Cam'ron, but instead the pink Wild Force ranger, Wordplay artist Jason Mraz!

"Man, I can't believe I crashed my flamingo zord on this planent. And to make things worse, I was about ask those girls for directions or help fixing it, and they run from me! I tell ya, it ain't easy being pink."

Mraz's flamingo zord let out a loud scream.

"Look, didn't I tell you I'd find out from Shayla if she can fix you up?" the zord screamed in response. "Well then you'll have to wait until I can catch up with her. I swear, you can be so annoying some times." Mraz said as he continued walking.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

It was morning time, and all of the rangers were just waking up. Everyone was groggy and still very sleepy. That was until Tommy let out a loud shriek that was heard threw the entire fortress.

"What happened?" Adam said as he and the others entered Tommy's bathroom. It was then that they noticed that Tommy(who in case you forgot had recently grown back his hair.) was now completely bald. Everyone instantly started laughing. It wasn't until they all looked in Tommy's giant mirror that hey realized that they were also bald.

"Who would take away my lovely locks?" Jack screamed. Not even a moment later, Damon and TJ entered the room wearing wigs made from the hair of the other rangers.

"I think we should run." TJ said to Damon.

"Me too." Damon said as the two of them tryed to slink out of the room. As soon as everyone noticed them in there new "wigs", they began to chase Damon and TJ.

Just as they werre chasing the hair thiefs, Diddy stopped Nick and Chip.

"Tell me fellas, do you two anything about...magic?" Diddy asked

"Um, yeah." Chip said.

"What do you know about...dark magic?" Diddy asked with a sly smile

"Look, if you wanna know bout magic and stuff, read some Harry Potter something. We're kinda busy." Nick said as he Chip continued the chase.

"Hmm, McWandos!" Diddy said. His faithful Koala walked up to him. "Fetch me as many Harry Potter related books and movies as you can find."

Location: Malltopia

After hours of searching, they finally found the ship, parked near a huge house. The man who bought the ship walked out the house toward the ship. He was carrying a keg and lots of junk food with him.

"Greetings ladies. I was just going to play some poker with a few friends of mine. You ladies wanna join?" the man said.

"Hell no we don't want..." Jen began, but Kat stopped her. She then ushered everyone intop a small huddle.

"Z's really good at poker. I think we should let her play and try to win the ship back." Kat said

"What do you say Lizzy? You up for the task?" Taylor asked.

Z sighed and pulled out a yellow plastic visor. "I guess I don't have a choice. Let's just get this over with." Z said as she and the others entered the ship.

Location: Unknown

Diddy stood outside a giant, evil looking tree. He knocked on the door carved into it for several moments.

"Why are at my door stranger?" Korragg said from behind Diddy.

"Are you Korragg?" Diddy asked.

"Yes. State your business! I want to get inside and enjoy these brownies that I purchased at the market." Korragg said.

"Sorry. I wanted to know if you could help me with some spells." Diddy asked

"Of course not! You are not worthy of my magic!"

"I have muffins." Diddy said.

"...Do you have chocolate muffins?" Korragg asked.

"Yep." Diddy said as he puled out a muffin

"Come inside. We have much to discuss." Korragg said as he ushered Diddy in.

After Korragg and Diddy were inside, they got down to business.

"Mr. Diddy, I have a wide array of spells you can use. I warn you, most of them involve the target blowing up." Korragg said

"Do you have any that don't involve the target blowing up?" Diddy asked.

"A few, is that what you need?"

"Yeah."

"Well, since you said this is to just annoy the enemy , I think I may have the perfect spell." Korragg said as he wrote down something on a piece of paper. He then gave the paper to Diddy.

"What do I do with this?" Diddy asked

"You will go to a lion named Aslon who lives in the tree down the street. Give him this note and he will give you a tub of spell butter..."

"Spell butter?"

"Spell butter! Once you've obtained the butter, dip your hand into the butter, and chant the names of the people you want to curse. Are we clear?"

"Yes. Thank you mighty Korragg. I am forever in your debt." Diddy said as he left Korragg's home. He did exactly what he was told and walked down to the home Aslon the lion. Apparently Aslon had a lot of request to fill because his tree was crowded. Diddy took a number and sat down so he could wait for his turn.

"I better send my enforcer to make sure those rangers don't escape." Diddy said

Location: Diddy's Fortress

After a long(and in some cases painful) spell by Chip, all of the rangers had regrown there hair, with the exception of Tommy who was still bald. The now bald Tommy was standing on a balcony, talking with Jason.

"Hey Jase, I haven't seen that Diddy guy in a few hours." Tommy said

"Maybve we should try to escape." Jason said

"That's a great idea! I get Billy and Ethan and the others so we can make a plan!" Tommy said

"Why don't you do it alone Mr. Greatest Power Ranger of All Time? You think Zack didn't tell me about what you call me when I'm not around?" Jason said.

"I...I don't know what your talking about."

"Ah shut up! I know you said it Tommy. Conner even told me about that time you "sinlge handely tore apart the Machine Empire." Jason said as he began shaking his head. He then got up and left Tommy sitting there.

"You've changed Dum Dum. Ever since that jungle kid called you the greatest, you haven't been the same." a voice said from behind Tommy. He turned around to see a tranparent image of Saba.

"Saba! How ya been old buddy?" Tommy said as he approached the talking sword.

"Don't touch me!" Saba said as he floated away from Tommy. "Like I was saying, when you were with me, you were humble. But ever since you got so...colorful, you've been hung up on being the best. You need to get back to basic Dum Dum."

"Your right Saba. I need to get back to basics. Back to white." Tommy said with a sly smile.

"Of course I'm right. I am the all knowing Saba after all." Saba was so busy talking that he didn't notice Tommy sneaking up behind him.

Tommy quickly snatched Saba from the air and placed him in front of him like a morpher. "Tigerzord!" Tommy said. Seconds later, he was morphed into his white ranger form.

"Why the hell did you do that?" an enraged Saba said

"You said I needed to get back to basics. So, I thought you meant for me to morph again." Tommy said. "Anyway, I'm going to find a mirror and admire myself for exactly 31 minutes. Then, I will explain my wonderful plan of escape to the guys."

"Well, I do like self-admiration." Saba said as he and Tommy left the room. While they go off to look at there reflections, let's go to another room in the fortress.

Nick, Hunter, Shane, Conner, Sky, and Jack all walked into the room where the others are. They all are wearing very odd clothing. Nick is wearing a red cape and hood, a pair of blue jeans, and a pair of black cowboy boots. Sky had one a a small red and blue police officer uniform that also came with the Chips style shades. Jack was dressed in a grey and red pimp and even had a cane. Conner had on a pair of red and black basketball shorts with a red tank top that was cut off just above his stomach. Hunter had on a pair of blue jeans, a red scarf, and red highlights in his hair. Finally, Shane had on a pair of red swim trunks and a Chicago Bulls jersey.

"So...what's with the new wardrobe?" Rocky asked threw snickering.

"Look, we were the ones that got chosen for that damn boy band. We just got threw shooting a video and recording an entire album, so were pretty tired." Sky said.

"Yeah." the others chorused.

"Ok, if you say so." Zack said.

"Ok rangers, whatever your planning, I suggest you stop right now." everyone turned to see a man dressed in a white and brown suit with a black Hamburglar style mask.

"Who are you?" Chip asked

"Me? I'm the Pied Piper of R and B! I am R. Kelly!" the man said.

"Ow, ow, can I get an authograph?" Chad asked.

"Sure. You a big fan?" Kelly said as he signed a piece of paper for Chad.

"No, but I'm a big fan of the money this'll get my on eBay." Chad said

"Well anyway, I know of your plans to escape while Diddy is gone, so I've come to stop you." Kelly said

"But we weren't trying to..."

"Silence!" Kelly said as he cut Ethan off. "You will feel my wrath! Time for Time Force!" Kelly suit was like the others, but he had on of his masks on over the helmet and the color was golden. 'You will feel the wrath of my Golden Showers attack!"

After hearing this, some of the rangers fell to the ground laughing. Wes was laughing so hard that tears came to his eyes.

"Looks like we have to show this guy what real rangers can do." Jason said as he took a fighting stance.

"Um, Jase." Adam said. "We don't have our morphers."

"...We're screwed." Jason said

Location: B.A.S.S.

Z had just finsihed dominating the rich man and his friends, leaving them with only there socks. As the girls reboarrded the B.A.S.S. ,Kat noticed something on one of the computer screens..

"Hey guys, rememeber that tracking device I put on Diddy's Fortress?" Kat asked

"Um, no." Maya said

"Well anyway, it says that the fortress is at a halt not to far from here. If we put the ship into hyper drive, we should be able to catch up with it."

"Well what are we waiting for? Put this bitch into hyper drive and lets go!" Karone said as Taylor piloted the ship inot space once again.

"Wait!" Mraz said as he chased after the flying ship. "Oh well. At least this planet has some good malls."

What will happen next? Will the guys be able to fight off R. Kelly, or will his "Golden Showers" be to much for them?( I don't think Kells will do it since none of them are 14 year old girls.) Will the girls make it to the fortress? Will Diddy ever get his spell butter? Find out next chapter!


	7. Where'd You Go?

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

Greetings boys and girls! When we last visited our heros, Tommy was reunited with Saba and his white ranger powers, Z won the B.A.S.S. back, Koragg(or as I call him K. Raggy) was giving Diddy the hook up on some spell butter, and R. Kelly came to unleash his Golden Showers upon the rangers. Now, let's see what the rangers not on this journey are doing shall we?

Location: SPD Headquarters

Doggie and young Sam were sitting on a couch, sharing a large bowl of chicken nuggets and watching Justice League Unlimited. At the moment, Captain Marvel and Superman were engaged in a brutal battle.

"This is show is alright, but I miss the other one that used to come on." Doggie said.

"What other one?" Sam asked

"The one with Robin, and the black lightning guy." Doggie said.

"Black lightning guy? You mean Static Shock?"

"No I don't mean Static Shock! It had that one guy who was Asian who could make tornados by doing this." Doggie said as he spun around in a circle. "And it had that one Mexican guy with all the powers."

"Ah, your talking about Super Friends. And I don't know if El Dorado was Mexican though." Sam said

"What's the damn differnce?"

"Well actually..."

"Actually, I always liked that Indian guy with the growing powers. Apachee Chief! That was his name!" Sgt. Silverback said as he entered the conversation.

"Yeah, but I always seemed to like the villians best though. My favorite was Solomon Grundy." Doggie said.

"Born on a Monday." the other two chimed.

While they talk about Super Friends(possibly the greatest superhero themed TV show in the history of the world.), let's see what the newest power ranger is doing.

Location: Root Core

Daggeron and Jenji were both sitting in the living area of the Root Core. Daggeron was catching up on all the books he missed in the past few years, while Jenji was catching up on all the porn he missed.

"Jenji," Daggeron said not looking up from his book. "Where is the dragon?"

"I think it went in the kitchen to get some pasta." Jenji said.

Daggeron removed his reading glasses(which were roughly the size of a skateboard) and looked at Jenji. "You do realize that your not suppose to feed dragons carbs right?"

"Yeah, but Udonna keeps some of that special non-carb pasta in there. I'm sure it knows the difference."

"Jenji, the damn thing can't read. How will it know the difference?" Daggeron asked.

"Relax. What's the worst that could happen?" as soon as Jenji said this, Fire Heart came into the room. The dragon looked like it had a stomach ache, but other than that it looked normal.

"See? Our little dragon just a has tummy ache." Jenji said happily.

Fire Heart then let out a long groan and grew to the height of a megazord. It then started thrashing and rampaging about.

"Go to Aslon and se if he has some spell butter that will help us. I'll subdue it." Jenji said. Daggeron nodded and ran into the woods. It was then that Jeni realized he couldn't really fight. "Oh boy. Well, looks like I'll have to do something else to stall it." Jenji said.

Doing the first thing that came to his mind, Jenji sarted doing random dance moves which included breakdancing, polka, riverdancing, disco, and even a stripease. Fire Heart happily sat down and clapped with glee while the cat continued dancing.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

R. Kelly's Golden Shower attack was extremely powerful and it left all of the rangers injured. It didn't really help that non of them could morph. Just then, Tommy burst into the room.

"Who the hell are you?" Kells asked.

"Me? I am the amazing, talented, godly, Tommy Oliver!" Tommy said.

"Well then Mr. Tommy, I'm glad to see you. Now I have more to fall under my wrath!" Kells said.

Tommy then quickly and swiftly jumped near that others. He then tossed a smokebomb down, allowing them to escape. "Now Chip, I need you to morph."

"I can't morph. I don't have my morpher." Chip said

"Really? Then what you been castng spells with for the past few chapters?" Tommy asked proudly.

"Why my morpher of course." Chip said. "Oh! I do have my morpher! Wow, you are some kinda amazing Mr. Tommy." Chip said.

"I know, I know. Now quickly, morph and then use a spell to de-age Kelsey here into a teenager of about 14." Tommy said.

"Ok." Chip did as he was told and turned Kelsey into a child. "What next?"

"Now we hide, and let nature take it's course." Tommy said. He and the other then hid behind various objects, leaving Kerlsey in the open.

"What about me?" Kelsey asked.

"Don't sweat it, this is all part of Dr. O's amazing plan. Right?" Conner said. Tommy nodded.

"All right rangers, I have you cornered!" Kells said. He then noticed the young version of Kelsey stading in the middle of the floor. "Why hello there little lady. How are you today?" Kells said.

"I'm ok I guess."

"That's good. That's real good." Kells said as he demorphed and slowly approached her.

Tommy then leapt from his hiding spot with brutally defeated R. Kelly with his amazing martial arts skills.

"Where are the morphers?" Tommy demanded as he held his foot to Kelly's neck.

"In that big cabinet." Kells said pointing to a large cabinet on the wall. Rocky walked over and opened to find there morphers.

"Hm, how come we never went in here before?" he asked.

"He told me that a little troll called Jim Jones would eat my face If I went in there." Cole said.

"Hey wait a sec." Carlos said as he and Rocky started handing out morphers. "Where is Zhane's morpher?"

"A better question would be where is Zhane?" TJ said.

"And where did Sam go?" Bridge asked.

"It doesn't matter right now. What matters is that we can morph again." Sky said as he held his morpher.

"Ahem." Jack said rather loudly. Sky pretended not to here him, so Jack did it again.

"Fine." Sky said as he handed Jack the red SPD morpher.

"Now that that phase of my plan is done, Chip, please turn Kelsey back into an adult." Tommy said.

"Yeah...about that." Chip said

"You can't turn her back?" Ryan asked.

"Nope."

"How the hell is that possible? I mean, one would think that all you had to do is say the spell backwards or something to reverse it." Adam said

"Well it ain't that damn simple." Chip snapped.

"Wait a sec, I have an idea." Andross said. He pressed a button on his morpher. Moments later, a loud horn was heard.

"What's that?" Shane asked.

"That's our ride. I introduce to you, the Astro Megaship Mark 26 and a half, Version 6.0." Andross said proudly.

"26 and a half? Weren't you only up to like Mark 2 a few years ago?" Wes asked.

"I was, but someone keeps trying to "upgrade my ship" Andross said as he looked over to Justin, who calmly ignored him.

"Well then, i say we hop in and head home." Jason said.

"Wait, what should we do with this guy?" Chad asked.

"I know!" Max said as he turned the blue baseball cap he was wearing around so that it was backwards. He then pulled out a Pokeball and hit Kells with it.he turned into red light and got sucked into the ball. Moments later, the ball stopped moving.

"Yeah! I caught an R. Kelly!" Max said gleefully.

"You do realize we could've just arrested him right?" Jack said. "I'm pretty sure he was breaking some kind of law."

"Naw, I like him like this." Max said as he clipped the ball on his belt.

"All righty guys, let's move out!" Andross said as everyone docked the ship. Just as Cole was about to board the ship, something tugged on his shirt. He turned around to see it was McWandos.

"Do you wanna come with me?" Cole asked. McWando nodded. "Well then let's go little buddy!" McWando jumped into Cole's arms. Cole then ripped the sleeve off of McWando's tux and tied it around his head like a headband.

"Dammit Cole leave that koala and come on!" Andross yelled.

"No! He's my friend and he's coming with me!"

"Well then bring him and come on! I want to get at the controls before Joel tryed to pilot the ship."

"Too late" Kai said from inside the ship.

"Dammit." Andross said under his breath as he, Cole, and McWando enter the ship.

"Where to Cap?" Joel said from the cockpit.

"Set course for this Malltopia I've heard Diddy talk about." Andross said as he sat in his Captains Chair.

The Megaship flew away at great speed heading towards Malltopia.

Location: B.A.S.S.

As Taylor was piloting the ship towards Diddy's Fortress when suddenly there was a loud thomp on the side of the ship.

"Kim, go see what that was." Karone(whos current hairstyle was a green and burgundy bowlcut) said as she stirred in her captains chair. Apparently she was trying to take a nap.

"But I don't wanna..." Kim whined.

"I bet you don't wanna get turn to dust either! But that's gonna happen if you don't see what the hell that pounding is!" Karone said as she pointed her Wrath Staff at Kim. "And you go to!" she said as she pointed the staff at Katherine. The two pink rangers quickly ran to the hatch to see what it was. Moments later, they returned with a frozen Zhane. He was on his Galaxy Glider and was in a huge chunk of ice.

"Zhany poo!" Karone cryed. " I mean, er, it's Zhane. Somebody thaw him out."

Charlie pulled out a small blaster and thawed Zhane out.

"Zhany Poo!"

"Astronema!"

The two ran into each others arms and began making out in the nastiest possible manner.

"Get a room." Vida said.

"Good idea. Come on." Karone said as she picked Zhane up and carried him into another room.

"That was odd." Jen said.

"Screw you ya stupid son of a bitch!" Taylor yelled out the window of the B.A.S.S.

"Who were you talking to?" Alyssa asked.

"Some jackass in a blue spaceship that almost hit me." Taylor said.

Location: Megaship

"You better keep going you crazy bitch!" Joel yelled out at a passing ship. "Try to crash into me, I should let these blasters loose on your ass!"

"Why are you so pissed?" Andross asked.

"Some moron in a big ass space ship almost crashed into me! Can you believe that?" Joel said

"Yeah, some people." Andross said as he opened an issue of Rolling Stone magazine and began reading it.

Location: Aslon's Treehouse place

"Aslon!" Daggeron said as he runned in the tree.

"What is it Daggeron?" Aslon asked. Aslon resembled David Hasselhoff wearing the lion costume from the Wizard of Oz.

"Aslon, our pet dragon got into some pasta, and now it's really big and really angry." Daggeron said.

"Pet dragon? I thought dragons were all dead." Aslon said

"We have the last one."

"I don't believe you. If I, the all knowing and mind bogglingly attractive Aslon has not heard of it, then it cannot be true."

"But I just told you about it." Daggeron said

"And this means what?"

"That means you now know of it, meaning that it must be true."

"Very true. If you continue with brilliance, you will become as wise I." Aslon said. He then went into his giant walk in fridge and came out with several sticks of purple butter. "Feed this to the dragon. It should die within the hour."

"Um, we kinda want it to be alive." Daggeron said.

"Well I haven't spell butter for that purpose. But I do some slightly more expensive spell custard that should do the job." Aslon said

Daggeron quickly looked threw his coin purse. "Ok, give me that then."

"Just a moment." Aslon left and returned with the spell custard. "That'll be 20,000 gil."

"Well...I only have dollars."

"Dollars? How ever do you spend those?" Aslon asked.

"Well it's funny you ask. 1 dollar equals 20,000 gil. So here you go." Daggeron said as he gave Aslon the single.

"You silly humans sure do pack alot of worth into such small amounts of currency. Here you go. Simply feed this to the dragon to return it to normal." Aslon said.

"Thanks." Daggeron said as he ran out of the tree.

"I really hope those rangers haven't escaped. Oh well, if they did I'll just use those songs and videos I made them do to make a profit." Diddy said as he awaited to be served.

Location: Diddy's Fortress

"All right you slimy bastard, give us back our mens!" Jen said as the girls stormed threw into the fortress all morphed.

"I'm sorry! I was just making some hamburgers!" Sam screamed as he put his hands up.

"Sam?" Z asked. Sam nodded. "Where the hell is Diddy?"

"He went out on an errand."

"Where are the others?" Katie asked.

Sam looked around. "Um, I think they may have left without me Guess I overslept" Sam said

"An even better question would be where are your pants?" Trini asked.

"This is my sleeping attire." Sam said.

"That I can understand, but why are you wearing a damn thong?" Kira asked

"I like the comfort it provides." Sam said angerly.

"Why did it have to be pink?" Dana asked.

"Kinda makes you wanna change colors." Kendrix said as she shoke her head.

"Well go put some pants on so we can go find the guys." Z said.

"Xander's Home!" Xander screamed as he teleported into the ship. He still had on his green prison uniform and was carrying a bag of his clothes and other stuff.

"Where the hell have you been?" Taylor asked.

"Prison." Xander said. "Are you Kimberly?"

"Yeah." Kim answered.

"Here. Some guy named Goldar said for me to give you this." Xander said as he gave her a letter. "He said to read it in private. I think it may be a sex letter."

"Er...thanks." Kim said as she took the letter and quickly discarded of it.

"Ok, I'm ready to go." Sam said.

"Let's get back on the ship. We'll see what the captain wants us to when we get back onboard." Taylor said

Oh no! The Chick Force is looking for the Man Force, but there going in different directions! Will they ever find each other? Where will the girls go now? Will Mraz ever get off Malltopia? Will Fire Heart ever get back to normal size? Will Diddy ever get his damn spell butter? Find out next chapter!

A/N: Ok boys and girls, it might be a while until the next update. School's about to start up again, so I gotta get prepared for that. (Not to mention the fact that I forgot how the hell I was going to end this story .) One thing I can promise is that there will be a mx of five more chaps, but at least 2 more. Until then, rememer to tip your waiters, and GO VIKES!


	8. What Hurt's The Most

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers or anything else.

A/N: The narrator makes another cameo appearence! Hooray cameos!

Me and my assistants Carla and Blaze were sitting in my office, discussing things.

"Well look likes the ratings aren't what we expected." Carla said.

"Yeah they seem to be down." Blaze said

"Hmm, what are some of the more popular fics?" I asked

"There mostly slash." Carla said

"What's slash?" Blaze asked. Carla then whispered what it was into his ear. "Eewwww,...yaoi."

"Carla, print me out a list of the most popular slash couples please." I said as I twirled my pimp cane like Dr. House(that's right, I'm pimpin')

"I'm on it." she said as she left the office

"What are you planning?" Blaze asked

"Something desperate." I said. Carla then returned and gave me the print out. "OK, I'll be back. Prepare lunch while I'm gone." I said to Blaze

"Got it." Blaze said as he pulled out a pack of bolonga, bread, and a frying pan.

I made my down the hall to where the rangers were lounging about.

"Tommy, Jason, Adam, Rocky, Andross, Zhane, Leo, Kai, Ryan, Chad, Wes, Eric, Danny, Max, Cam, Hunter, Conner, Ethan, Trent, Sky, Jack, Bridge, Nick, and Xander, come here please." I said as the rangers in question all got up. "Follow me please."

We walked down the hall until we reached a big door. "Go ahead in and get comfy." I said as they were all in, I closed and locked the door.

"What's the deal? And why are we in a giant broom closet?" Adam asked.

"Look, I really hate to do this, but I need ratings. So, I decided to add some slash to this fics." I said threw the door.

"Your insane! Let us outta here!" Hunter said.

"Look, some of you better make with the boy-love or none of you are getting out!" I said

Everyone in the room looked to Sky and Jack.

"Well rookies, get to it." Jason said.

Realizing that they had no choice, Jack and KSy got very close for a kiss when...

"Dude!" Carla said as she ran up to me out of breath. "The ratings are actually great!"

"Really?" I asked

"Yeah, turns out Blaze read them upside down again."

"Cool. OK guys, you can come out." I said as I opened the door and all of them ran out.

Now, hopefully that won't scar Jack and Sky's already fragile relationship. Anyway, let's get back to the story.

Ok, last time we left off, the guys defeated and captured R. Kelly before escaping in the Astro Megaship Mark 26 and a Half Version 6.0, Daggeron went to get some spell custard to heal Fire Heart, and the B.A.S.S. and Astro Megaship passed each other in space. Oh yeah, we Xander and Sam are now traveling with the girls and we know that Sam wears a pink thong to bed(I knew there something odd about that guy). Now lets pick up with the Jenji and Daggeron shall we?

Location: Outside of the Root Core

"Jenji!" Daggeron yelled from inside the Solar Streak Megazord. "Come insdie Jenji!"

"Imma comin'!" Jenji said as he jumped into the zord.

"Here's the plan Jenji, I'm going to shot you into the dragon's mouth. Then I want you to spread this custard inside it and get the hell outta there!"

"Um, Daggeron I not to sure about..." Jenji couldn't finsih his sentence because Daggeron had stuffed him into his lamp with the custard.

"Ready? Magic Shining Jenji Kitty Cat Mystic Genie Lamp Three Wishes Alladin Robin Williams Blue Light Magic Carpet Super Saiyan Dragon Ball Cowboy Bebop MagiShine Smokey MagiRanger Here Come The Power Rangers Solaris I Hope Animal Rights Isn't Watching This Knight Blast Attack!" Daggeron said as he shot Jenji into Fire Heart's mouth. The dragon swallowed Jenji before fainting. "I hope Jenji can spread that custard before the dragon wakes up."

Location: Megaship

"How. Long. Until. We. Arrive. At. Malltopia?" Andross asked Trip. The entire team were dressed in Star Trek style outfits and Andross was trying to give his best Shatner impersonation.

"At least another couple of hours." Bridge(who was working navigation) said.

"Carter. What. Is. Troubling. You?" Andross asked.

"Nothing." Carter said. Andross then waddled his way over to Nick.

"Nick. You. Should. See. Whats. Troubling. Your. Father." Andross said

"He's not my dad."

"You. Know. What. I. Mean."

Nick(who had his cape on over his Star Trek uniform) sighed and went over to Carter.

"Hey Carter, why so blue?" Nick asked

"Well Nick, I'm starting to miss your mother. When we adopted you, we thought it would add some spark to our relationship. But it hasn't." Carter said

"Well when I get sad, I sing a song. You should give it a try."

"I think it will." Carter said as music started to play from seemingly nowhere. "I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house, that don't bother me. I can take a few tears now and then just let em out. " from there Carter went on to do a performance of Rascal Flatts' "What Hurts the Most".

After Carter was done, he dropped to the floor crying. The silence of the ship was broken when Sky, a single tear forming in his eye, stood up and began clapping. Soon the rest of the ship joined him in a chorus of claps. Some rangers even tossed roses at his him. Seconds later, everyone's attention turns to a golden pillar of light in the corner of the room. The light then turned into Daggeron, who was holding Fire Heart in his hands.

"Hey Big D." Chip said. "Glad you decided to join us."

"Yeah. Figured I should bring the dragon too. Wouldn't want it to get into more trouble." Daggeron said

"Why didn't you just leave it with Jenji?" Nick asked.

"Well you see.." Daggeron's eyes then got really big. "Chip, do you still know that spell that makes things vomit?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Use it on Fire Heart, hurry!" Daggeron quickly said.

Chip performed the spell and Fire Heart began vomiting violently, in the process freeing Jenji.

"Are you allright old friend?" Daggeron asked. Jenji said nothing. In fact he didn't even move.

"Speak to us Jenji! Do your Genie-Cat dance(the dance he used to subdue Fire Heart)!" Chip cryed. Jenji twitched slightly "Why won't you dance?" Chip continued

"Quickly!" Trip said. "Wes, Lucas take him to my mini lab. We must rebuld him!" Trip said.

"Anyway, you guys got tater tots on this place?" Daggeron asked.

"Cap'n, we have another ship in our area. In fact, it looks just like this one." Justin said in a confused tone.

"Open. A. Video. Communication. Link." Andross said

"No can do. But we can get an audio link. Will that do?" Justin asked.

"Yes. It. Will."

"Ok, link is up."

"Greetings. Other. Ship. I. Am. Captain. Andross. Who. Are. You?" Andross asked.

After a few seconds of silence, a voice comes over the speakers. "I. Am. MegaRed. From The Planent. Earth."

"I. See. My. Meters. Say. That. There. Is. A. Huge. Amount. Of. Power. On. Your. Ship. Are. Any. Of. You. Power. Rangers?" Andross asked

"No. But. We. Are. Members. Of. The. Super. Sentai." MegaRed said.

"I. Have. Heard. Much. About. The. Super. Sentai. Tell. Me. Where. Are. You. Headed?" Andross asked.

"We. Are. Going. To. Get. Our. Womanfolk. From. The. Grasps. Of. Michael. Jackson."

"Well. Then. I. Don't. Want. To. Hold. You. Up. So. Please. Be. On. Your. Way." Andross said.

"Later. Comrades." MegaRed said as the ship flew off into space.

"They seemed like really nice guys." Conner said

"Who were you talking to?" Jason asked as he Tommy, Zack, and Billy entered the room.

"We just had a discussion with some guy from Super Sentai! Ain't it cool?" Conner said happily

Tommy's eyes got huge and he slapped Conner in the face. "Don't you ever speak to those evil murdering Sentais ever again. Do you here me?" Tommy yelled.

"Ok! No prob Dr. O, just stop with the slapping." Conner said

"What's his problem?" Nick asked

"Long story." Zack said as her shoke his head.

Moving right along, let's see what's going on on the B.A.S.S.

Location: B.A.S.S.

Xander sat in the kitchen area, eating some waffles and thinking about how he was going to seperate Lucas and Nadria. Perhaps a spell would work? He would need help for that to work. Vida was out of the question because she'd probally give some sarcastic remark before turning it down. Last time he asked Clair for help with a spell, he ended up getting turned into a panda. Udonna would just give him some kind of silly lecture. Maybe Madison would help? But then again, what if she thought he was trying to break Lucas and Nadria up so that he could get with her? There was no way he was risking that. Then an idea hit him.

"You!" he said as he pointed to Sam.

"Agh! Don't hurt me, I'm only an elected offical!" Sam screamed.

"What?" Xander asked

"Um, nothing. You needed something?"

"Yeah, I kinda need your help with something." Xander then went on to explain his problem to Sam

"Wow, that kinda sucks." Sam said. "Well, I think I can help you out. Just leave it to Uncle Sam."

"Thanks mate. I'm going to go lay down. Being in prison really drains a guy." Xander said.

Location: Megaship

Andross is standing outside of the Megaship. He, like the rest of the crew, is dressed like a pirate with a large hat with a red feather sticking ou of it. Also, he has a monkey on his shoulder for some reason. He took a bite into a red apple he had in his pocket and smiled.

"Chip, what do you see?" Andross yelled to Chip who is sitting in a large crow's nest that they built on top of the ship. It should also be noted that he has on his cape over the pirate costume.

"Malls Cap'n! Malls as far as the eye can see!"

"Argh, I think we're there." Andross said.

"Good." Justin said. He had on alot of eye makeup and his hair was dreaded in some places. Apparently he was doing his best Jack Sparrow inpersonation. "I could really use some rum."

"Ok men!" Andross proclaimed. "We've hit land! Somewhere on this planent, we will find clues to help us find our womanfolk. And while your out there, for the love of God, don't steal any cursed Aztec gold." Andross said "But don't forget our motto."

"Can we sing the song Cap'n?" Jack asked.

"I suppose so. One, two, three!"

"Do what you want cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!" everyone sang. "Yo ho, live your life free, being a pirate is allright to be! Do as you like cause a pirate is free, you are a pirate!" The crew sang.

"Ok men, let's move out!" Andross said as the crew went out to search the city.

Leo, TJ, Justin, and Carlos were walking threw one of the malls, looking long and hard for a mask shop.

"Cool, Hellmasker, this sounds like a good place to get a mask" Carlos said.

"Good. While your inside, me and TJ will complete out secret blue ranger mission." TJ said

"Wow, how top secret is this mission?" Carlos asked

"It's so top secret that if we tell you about it, we'll die." TJ said.

"I guess I'll go with you." Leo said

"Sounds like fun. Anyway, we'll be back in a few." Carlos said as he and Leo entered the shop.

"Come on Teej, let's go find a Subway so we can get those subs." Justin said. Blue rangers must eat at least five subs a day to survive, and today it was TJ and Justin's day to get the subs.

"Damn, did Billy say if he wanted a cookie or not?" TJ asked.

"Don't think so. Now that I think of it, Billy's been kinda quiet lately. Wonder why that is." Justin simply shrugged it off and they kept on walking.

Carlos scanned the room looking for where the wrestling masks. His current Rey Mysterio mask he was nice, but it was starting to get a little dated. He noticed no Kane, Ultimo Dragon, or any other kind of wrestling masks.

"Excuse me sir, do you happen to have a green and black La Parka mask?" Carlos asked the clerk

"La Parka? Is he that bone wrestling fellow from WCW?" the clerk asked. Carlos nodded. "Sorry boy, we only carry super hero mask here."

"That sucks ass." Carlos said sadly

"Perhaps I coudl interest you and your friend in...these." the clerk said as he opened a closet behind him.

"Oh my stars and garters, it's wonderful."

Location: B.A.S.S.

Xander awoke from his slumber to find Sam setting on the edge of his bed with a worried look on his face.

"Ok, give me news." Xander said expecting the worse.

"Well, I figured that since this was such a vital mission, I should get some help. So I asked Z to help me out. She said this was a toughie and asked Syd for help. Then I had an idea and I emailed Nova to see if she could help. Then we all put our heads to formulate a plan. Sadly we couldn't think of one."

"Well I guess it can't any worse than that." Xander said.

"Actually, when Z told Syd that the mission was Top Secret, Syd thought that she said it was no secret, and told the entire ship. Now everyone thinks your either A) A psycho who doesn't like to see people happy, B) Think you have a thing for Nadria, or C) They think you have a thing for Trip." Sam said.

Xander simply sighed and put his head in his hands. Why did things always fail for him?

Location: Trip's mini lab in the Megaship

"I've done it!" Trip said as he removed the equipment he was wearing. "I have created him!"

The screen flips to Darth Vader like version of Jenji laying on the operating table.

"Rise! Rise Darth Jenji!" Trip said as "Darth Jenji" stood up. "Can you hear me? Speak to me!"

Heavy breathing came from Jenji as he spoke. "Go Jenji, go Jenji!" Jenji said as he did his Genie-Cat dance.

Trip laughed insanely as the screen turned black.

How will Xander deal now that his plan is gone to pieces? And more importantly(in his opinion), what does Madison think of him? WHat mask did the man offer Carlos? Why hasn't Billy had much to say in this story? And what does Tommy have against, as he put it, those evil murdering Sentai? Find out in coming chapters!

A/N: Ok, I'm stopping this chapter here. And in case your wondering, the pirate song the gang sings is not mind. My friend sent it to me through a link and I laughed my ass off(If you ask, I'll send ya a link.) Don't know who made it, but it wasn't me. Anyway, tip your waiters, control the pet population, and GO SOONERS!


	9. Turning Japanese

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers

Have a seat boys and girls! Tommy is about to tell the tale of the Evil Sentai!

All of the rangers except Carlos and Leo sat at a large table in one of the food courts of one of the malls. The decided to stop for a bite to eat and to wait for the Carlos and Leo to find a new mask. To pass the time, Tommy decided to tell a story

"It was a cold day. It was always cold in Angel Grove." Tommy began

"No it isn't. It's always like 80 degrees." Rocky said.

Tommy reached into his pocket and pulled out a taser. He then violently shocked Rocky. "Maybe now you'll learn not to interrupt your king. As I was saying."

Just then, Carlos and Leo jump onto the table. Carlos was dressed like non another than the Green Arrow.

"Greetings! It is I, the Green Lantern! And this my, um, partner assistant guy." Carlos sputtered out.

"You mean sidekick?" Adam asked.

"Yes! My sidekick Quicky!" Carlos exclaimed

"Um, it Speedy." Leo sayed quietly.

"Yes, sorry. It is Speedy. I really should do some research before I start doing these costumes." Carlos said

"Anyway, can I please get back to my story?" Tommy asked. Carlos and Leo quickly took seats and gestured for him to continue. "Now, Rita had just recently made a candle of magic wax, that, when it burned out, my powers would leave me. And let me tell you, that andle was getting pretty low. So one day at the Youth Center, we decided to make a plan of action."

Location: Angel Grove(flashback)

"So what are we going to do? I mean, we need Tommy for us to keep combating Rita." Trini said

"I have an idea." Jason said. "My cousin who lives in Japan who says theres this group of heros called the Super Sentai thats been around since about the mid seventies. And when Zordon started describing the powers and stuff, I instantly thought about Super Sentai. I'm not sure, but I think we might be able to find something to help Tommy over in Japan." Jason explained.

"I'm not to sure about this Jase. I mean, if these people were real, why would Zordon have formed us?" Tommy asked.

"If you were a crime fighter in Japan, would you wanna come over here everytime there was evil afoot?" Jason asked

"Good point."

"Well I think we should head over there." Kim said.

"I'm reluctant to derail this plan of operation; but teleporting to Japan would be extremely difficult to accomplish without alerting Zordon or Alpha." Billy said

"Then we won't teleport!" Tommy exclaimed.

"Then how are we going to get there?" Trini asked sarcasticlly

"Follow me!" Tommy said as he morphed(keep in mind this is the middle of a public park with many witnesses) and ran near the beach. The others simply shrugged and followed suit.

"Hey Bulk, did those dweebs just turn into the Power Rangers?" Skull asked.

"No way! I mean, they're not coll enough for that!" Bulk exclaimed

The rangers to the beach, where Tommy pulled out his dagger and summoned the Dragonzord. Oddly, the zord did emerge from it's hiding place. After ten minutes of trying with no result, Tommy tryed a drastic idea.

"Hold this for a sec." Tommy said as he gave Zack the Dragon Dagger.

"What's the point of this?" Zack asked. His question was answered moments later when the Dragonzord appeared and pummeled him with it's tail.

"Bout time.": Tommy said as he jumped inside his zord. Jason put Zack on his back and jumped in with the other rangers.

"Wow, I didn't know this zord was so roomy." Kim said. "Why do always insist on standing on it instead of being inside?" her question was answered moments later/

"Sweet God, what is that smell?" Zack said as he came to.

"That's the zord's natural aroma." Tommy said.

"How long does the scent last?" Kim asked.

Tommy slowly turned to her. "Forever!"

7 hours later

The gang arrived in Japan a few hours ago, but had no idea on where to find the Sentai ranger they needed. Finallly, Jason had an idea. He walked up a random man and began beating him badly.

Suddenly, someone began yelling at him in Japanese. He turned around to see non other than the Zyurangers!

"Ah, just who we needed to see." Tommy said

TyrannoRanger said something. Of course, the gang didn't understand them.

"Let me try this in English. Why are you here, and what do you want? And better yet, why are you pummeling that poor random man!" TyrannoRanger asked.

Jason looked at the man he wa pummeling. "Sorry good sir. You have done a great thing." Jason said. The man cursed him in Japanese and kicked Jason in the balls, leaving him in the fetal position.

"I plan to make this as quick as possible. We're Power Rangers from America and we came because I'm losing my powers via this pretty green candle, and I was wondering if I could have yours." Tommy said to DragonRanger.

"You want DragonRanger's power? What are you-?" MammothRanger was silenced as DragonRanger kicked him and the others into a wall.

"Of course I could give you my powers." DragonRanger began. "But, I'm suffering a similar fate to you, and we would have to switch candles for such a power transfer to happen. But I do have alot of time left on my candle, so you would have time to still do some good before you di..,er, I before the power leaves you."

"Cool cool. Do you have your candle with you?" Tommy asked as he pulled out his.

"Of course I do." DragonRanger said.

"Don't do it!" TriceraRanger screamed from the background. Moments later, DragonRanger's dragon mecha appeared and began shooting several missles at the Zyuranger.

"Bro, your zord is shooting at your teammates." Jason pointed out. How he could see this from his current fetal position was unknown

"My what?" DragonRanger asked

"Giant missle shooting dragon samurai battle robot thingy." Zack said pointing to the mecha

"Oh. Don't mind that, it's how we train."

"He's lying!" TigerRanger said. He was then promptly stepped on by the mecha.

"Look, are you going to give me the candle or not?" DragonRanger asked.

'Sure. So we just like switch out or something?" Tommy asked. DragonRanger nodded. "Great, now I can be a ranger for a little while longer"

"Excellant, now I don't have to die." DragonRanger said. Everyone(with the exception of the Zyuramger, who were still getting pummeled in the background by the mecha) looked at him. Even though everyone still had on helmets, DragonRanger could tell they were looking at him funny. "Um, see, haha, there's that lady that like, said she'll eat me if she ever saw me with my powers again. So now that I won't have them for much longer, I won't have to be eaten."

"Why? Why can you can not see the lies!" TriceraRanger said. The dragon mecha than promptly sat on the entire team.

"Ok, you should heading home, wouldn't want the media to see us talking." DragonRanger said as he quickly showed the rangers into Tommy's zord.

End Flashback

"And that's why I hate those damn dirty bastards." Tommy said bitterly

"Because the guy traded candles with you? I may have missed something, but wasn't that a good thing?" Sky asked.

"NO!" Tommy yelled as he slapped Sky with Jack. "It was a horrible thing!"

"Calm down bro." Jason said. "Maybe I should continue with the story."

Location: Command Center(flashback)

_Ok, it had been about a month since we went over to Japan to get that candle so that Tommy could stay a ranger. Wow, look how cool my words look. I could talk like this all day. Wonder if it'll stay like this if I sing. 'Where is the moment you needed the most? Kick up the leaves and the magic is lost. Tell me your blue skies fade to grey, tell me your passion's gone away, and I don't need no carryin on!_

"Dammit Jase! Just the tell the story!" Nick's voice cut into the narration

_Watch your mouth when you talk to me rookie. It's rude. Anyway, on this particular day we were in the Command Center after a battle. Zordon wasn't in the center that day and Tommy's candle was about to run out._

"Well, that candle looks pretty low." Jason said

"Yeah, so I guess my time is almost over." Tommy said sadly. "I'm really gonna miss working with you guys."

"Same here man." Zack said

"I just don't know if I can go without you Tommy" Kim said.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you I'll be back one day." Just then, the candle stopped burning.

Tommy's eyes grew extremely wide and he dopped to the floor.

"Tommy? What's wrong bro?" Jase asked

Billy went over and began examining Tommy to see if he was sick. His eyes then got the size of eggs.

"What's wrong with him Billy?" Kim asked

Billy quickly whispered something into Trini's ear. She then ran over to Tommy and began checking his pulse. "Oh my God." she said. "Tommy's dead."

"Oh shit!" Zack said

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kim screamed

"Lies!" Jason said as he pushed Trini and Billy aside. He then started yelling "Wake up bro!" over and over while beating Tommy in the face.

_It was hopeless. Zack's black ranger cursing, Kim's pink ranger screaming, Trini's yellow ranger stunness, Billy's blue ranger shockness, not even my red ranger beating could revive him. And since Zordon and Alpha would be back soon, we needed a solution._

"Did you guys hear that?" Zack asked in the flashback.

"Yeah, it kinda sounded like..me." Jason said

_Whoa. My flashback can hear me!_

"That is me! Maybe me from the future!" Jason said

_Yes! I am from the future! Listen to me very carefully me, in the near future you will meet a girl named Emily. Run from her! Run as fast and far as you can! She may be hot, but she's into some odd stuff._

"What kind of weird stuff?" Jason asked

_Let's just say, there will be blood. There will be blood..._

End flashback

"Hey! I wasn't done talking to me!" Jason said

"Well I'm sorry, but holding a flashback spell for that long is kinda hard to do." Nick said

"So what a sec, that's why you hate Sentai rangers Dr. O?" Ethan asked. Tommy nodded. "Well that's kinda...stupid."

"Yeah. I mean, from the way you guys tell it, the others tryed to warn you. You just didn't listen." Bridge said

"And I mean, that one guy was the only one that did you wrong. I'm pretty sure the rest of them are nice guys. I mean come one, they save the day for Pete's sake!" Chip said

"And dude, what if, like, your in Japan one day, and like, some monster dudes try to attack you, and like, you can't morph, and like some Sentai dudes came and saved you? Like, then you'd owe them." Dustin said

"And Tommy, we really need to embrace our Sentai brethern. It's bad enough some of fans despise each other." Jack said

Everyone's eyes grew extremely wide.

"Why Jack, whatever are you talking about? You make it seem as if Sentai and Power Rangers are TV shows with fan followings." Adam said loudly and nervously.

"Yes Jack, you know that could never happen. Haha." Eric said, shifting his eyes

"What was thinking? Oh silly me." Jack said. All of the rangers then stared at the camera that was shooting the fic and began laughing nervously.

"Hey! I finally found you guys!' everyone turned around to see the most beloved ink ranger in history! No, not Kim, Jason Mraz!(way to save the day eh?)

"Hey Pinky, what can we do for ya?" Tommy asked

"I need your help! My flamingo zord is ever so sick!" Mraz said

"Come Mr. McWandos! We must help this man's zord!" Cole said as he and his koala jumped up.

"You ain't goin nowhere until you answer me some questions." a rich looking man said.

"A friend of yours?" Conner asked Mraz. Mraz shook his head.

"I'll be askin all the question around here!" the man said. "Do any of you know this girtl?" he asked when he showed a picture of Z.

"Yeah, that's my daughter." Danny said

"Ok, do you reconize this ship?" he showed them a pic of the B.A.S.S.

"Aye, that be me ship." Andross said.

"One last question. Do you know _this_ girl?" he then showed a pic of Ashley.

"Of course, that's me woman!" Andross said proudly

"Well she sold me this ship, and the other one stole it back!"

Andross was quiet. "She sold you my ship?"

"Yep."

"...She's dead to me." Andross said

"Whoa, how did my little girl cheat you out of a ship?" Danny asked

"Well me and her are playing cards for the ship. I'm winning hands down when she makes like 5 clones of herself! So I ask what's going on, and the clones attacked me! Three of them even put me threw a table like The Dudley Boys!" the man said. "And when I came to, she was gone with the keys and the ship!"

"Sorry to hear that, but there's nothing that can be done." Andross said

"Oh yes there is..." the man said as he pressed a button on his watch and several hundred Blue Senturions with MBSD(Malltopia Blus Sentruion Department) on them

"Oh boy."

Oh no! What will happen now that the Blue Senturion are involved? And will Tommy ever learn to like Sentai rangers? And will Cole save Mraz's zord? Find out next chapter!

A/N: Might be a while until the next update. Got more school work than I thought I would have.


	10. Game Over

Disclaimer: I don't own Power Rangers or anything else mentioned in this fic.

Ok, last time we were here, Tommy and Jason told the epic story of why Tommy hates them Sentai folk. Carlos and Leo also debuted there new costumes; the Green Arrow and Speedy respectively. And Andross now knows that Ashley sold the B.A.S.S. earlier, and everyone learns that Z stole the ship back as opposed to winning like we thought. Well, lets pick with the guys shall we?

"Dammit Ashley!" Andross said as he tossed his pirate hat to the ground. "Not only does she sell my big ship, but now because of her the damn Blue Senturions took my Megaship as collateral!"

"Well it's not that..." Justin began, Andross quickly cut him off.

"And I just know that she and Zhane ran off together! They might not know that I know, but I know!"

"I have a plan!" TJ proclaimed. "You two, morph and follow me!" he said pointing to Kai and Damon. TJ then morphed and flew into space on his Galaxy Glider. Kai and Damon shrugged before hoping into there Jet Jammers and following suit.

"Hey guys, can one of you please help me with my zord?" Mraz whined

"Who the hell is this one guy?" Mike asked.

"I dunno. I think he's in Maroon 5 or something." Max answered

"Naw, I'm pretty sure he plays quarterback for the Raiders." Joel adds.

"Come Mr. McWandos! We must help this man's zord!" Cole said

"Didn't you just say that a little while ago?" Ryan asked.

"Sorry, I tend to be repeating myself lately." Cole said. "Anyway, let's go!" Cole grabbed McWando as the two ran in the direction that they thought lead to Mraz's zord.

"Wait! My zords other way!" Mraz said as he chased the moron and his pet.

"Hey Billy, I meant to ask you something. Why have you been so silent lately?" Justin asked

"And come to think of it, you haven't said anything for a while either Eric." Wes said

"Do you really want to know?" Billy asked. Everyone nodded with excitement. "Well, the reason for my unusual silence is quite simple. You see, things are what they seem; for I am a Billy, but not the Billy you know and possibly love. I am..." Billy then ripped of his mask to reveal..."Musical legend Billy Joel! Muahahhahahahaa!"

Everyone let out a gasp.

"And you see, I also have a secret to tell; for my name is not Eric Myers" Eric said as he removed his mask to show "I am the great Eric Clapton!"

Another surprising gasp was heard.

"And if you think that was shocking, wait until you hear this! Though I may appear to be Rocky DeSantos, in reality, I am..." Rocky then removed his mask to reveal...Rocky

"Your such a jackass." Blake said as he rubbed his temples.

"A regular moron. And that's comin from me!" Shane said "I really shouldn't enjoy degrading myself like that."

"Hey, if you don't do it, someone will." Cam said calmly

"Tell me where Billy is! I need him to show me how to tie my shoe again!" Tommy roared at Billy Joel

"And I need Eric to remind me how stupid I am!" Wes cried.

"Well I'll tell you where they are. Mr. Cranston is in my fortress, constructing my Piano Man Megazord, powered by a magic keyboard!" Joel exclaimed

"And Eric is with him, making sure none of Master Joel's enemies try to sabotage the project" Eric Clapton said

"Give us back our geek you psycho!" Tommy yelled.

"You dare insult my lord?! I will destroy you!" Clapton said. He then pressed something that resembled a morpher. "Now I will show you to fear us!"

A giant Beetlebord with a guitar then appeared from the sky "Fear the wrath of my Beetleborg Clapton Megazord!"

"Aw man, we need a megazord!" Tommy said. And as soon as he said this, the B.A.M. came crashing down into the planet.

"Hop in guys!" Taylor said over the loud speaker.

The guys quickly ran on board to find TJ, Kai, and Damon inside with the girls.

"Hey, how'd you guys find them?" Hunter asked

"Just floated in space hitchhiking." Damon said

"Yeah, I remember Ashley saying she could never say no to a hitchhiker." TJ said

"Hey Teej, remember that one time Zhane got knocked out the ship and Ashley thought he was a hitchhiker and Andross told her she couldn't pick him up?" Carlos asked

"Yeah, Zhane was out there for days." TJ said with a smile.

"Speaking of, where be that woman stealin excuse for a first mate?' Andross asked.

"Dude, you can stop with the pirate voice." Dustin said

"Argh, I been talkin like this for so long, me forgot how to talk any other way." Andross said

Just then, Karone ran into the room with Zhane just a step behind her. She was dressed in a skimpy Batgirl costume and he was dressed in a very small very tight Robin suit(he even has those little elf boots Robin use to wear shudders) Both of them stopped dead in front of Andross and froze.

"Doing a little role playing eh?" Andross asked

"Um,...this isn't what it look likes." Zhane said.

"I see." Andross said. "Get em Monkey!" Andross then tossed his pet monkey on Zhane. The monkey violently and meanly ripped into Zhane as he screamed like a little girl.

Just then, in a bright flash of green light, Trip appeared in black and green robes with a hood that concealed most of his face. Next to him was Jenji...er...Darth Jenji.

"Jenji! What happened to you?" Maddie asked

"Daggeron shot me into the dragon's mouth, down it's throat! And let's just say the stomach of a dragon ain't a very safe place to be." Jenji breathed.

"Hey, it had to be done! How else would I get the spell custard into it's system?" Daggeron defended.

"You could've tryed feeding it to him. It does eat anything you know." Vida said as the others nodded.

"Well I know that now." Daggeron said calmly

Just then, Clapton let loose an assault on the zord.

"We're not strong enough to fight him! We'll be dead in no time if this keeps up!" Justin said

"Look, up in the sky!" Jack said

"It's a bird!" Ashley proclaimed

"No, it's a plane!" Kat said

"No no, it's a bird that flies like a plane!" Cassie yelled

"It's a pink flamingo zord!" Shayla concluded

Mraz's zord came soaring threw the air with Cole, McWandos and Mraz inside.

"Do it now!" Mraz yelled over his loud speaker.

Aisha pressed on a button on the megazord wall that read "Press button in case of emergancy need to fuse zords to stop evil musicians or when a really cool artest that get's no props says to do it now."

"We need FlamingoWild Big Ass Megazord power now!" everyone yelled as the two zords came together to form the new zord.

This zord then began to punish Clapton. Just when they had him on the ropes, Kira heard something in the distance.

"Oh...my...God." she said lowly

"What is it?" Trent asked

"That music..." she said

"What music? Who's song is it?' Trent asked as he began to shake her violently

"BILLY JOEL!!!" she screamed.

A large piano-like megazord then dropped from the sky and came to Clapton's defense.

"AHAHAHAHA! I have returned for your heads rangers!" Billy Joel said as he played his keyboard and made the zord take a fighting stance.

"What the hell is your problem dude?" Tori asked "We didn't do anything to you!"

"You think I care?! I just want you out of the way so that I may put my evil plans into effect!"

"Can we leave now?" Eric whined from inside the zord with Billy and Billy Joel

"Sure whatever." Billy Joel said. Billy and Eric then morphed and jumped into the Flamingo-B.A.M.

"I guess this is it guys!" Rocky yelled as Clapton and Billy Joel hit the zord at once with powerful attacks. "It's been a fun ride, but I think this is our stop!"

"Hold me son!" Carter yelled as he jumped into Nick's arms.

"Me too!" Dana said as she too jumped into the arms of Nick.

"Me aswell!" Udonna said.

"My...spine!" Nick said as he fell due to the wieght he was carrying

"You built the thing Billy, surely you made a secret device that disarms it or something right?" Trent said

"Negative" Billy said.

"...And why didn't you do that?" Trent asked

"Um, see, I,... even a genius forgets stuff sometimes!" Billy said as he began to cry on Adam's shoulder

"Gee, why am I always the one people cry on?" he asked

"It's because your shirts feel like tissue." Billy said as he sneezed into Adam's sleeve

"Rangers!" a familar voice boomed throughout the air.

"Zo..Zordon?" Trini asked nervously.

"NO!" The voice boomed angerly. "He's dead dammit! I am his father, Zordon Zero" the voice said. Zordon Zero then appeared on one of the viewing screens.

"Hey Big Z. You here to give us help?" Rocky asked

"Um, no actually. Alpha lost the remote and we were wondering if you knew where it was."

"I didn't lose it! I just...don't know where it is right now." Alpha said as he made his way to the screen.

"Alpha? Is that you?" Trini asked.

"Trini!" Alpha said as he ran to the screen. "Save me Trini! He's mistreating me! I haven't had food in years!"

"That's cause you don't eat you moron." Zordon Zero snapped back

Alpha completely ignored this and continued talking "And he doesn't read me bedtime stories, and he makes me do all the work around here!"

"That's cause I can't do anything like this! And work? All you do is sit around and watch Babar all day!"

"Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!!"Cam yelled in frustration. "Now bald man, do you or do you not have zords we can use to defeat this psycho piano player and his guitar playing minion?"

"Psycho piano player? Guitar playing minion? Damiit, are Billy Joel and Eric Clapton bothering you kids?" Zordon Zero asked. "When will those silly bastard just leave people alone. Alpha! See if those pro wrestler zords are still working."

"Kay!" Alpha said as he happily skipped in the back "Yeah, they seem to be in good condition!" Aplha yelled back

"Excellant, send them to the rangers." Just then, seven large zords appeared outside the B.A.S.S. "Rangers, behold your new zords!"

"This is the Black Undertaker zord. This is the pink Shawn Michaels zord. This is the green Ted DiBase zord. This is the white zord. It was made to fit the liking of, um, that one guy. Oh damn, what was his name...Steamboat! This is the white Ricky Steamboat zord! And these two the best of them all; the blue Ric Flair and yellow Randy Savage zords!" as soon as Zordon Zero said this, a large red and yellow zord jumped in the way of the Flair and Savage zords. "And this of course is the glory hoggin Hulk Hogan zord."

"Do you think your silly little zords can stand a chance against this?" Billy Joel said threw the megaphone of his zord

Before anyone could respond, the Hulk Hogan zord started yelling "Well let me tell ya somethin brother, I've sat back and watched you opress and belittle my Hulkamaniacs for too long! So I went home and did some deep spiritaul searching along with my vitimans and sayin my prayers brother, and I came up with a question; Watcha Gonna Do? Watcha Gonna Do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?!"

"Wow, this zord really sounds like Hogan." Chip said happily

"Yeah, you can even hear how feeble he is in his voice." Aisha said dryly.

"Maybe they transfered his mind into it or something. Is that possible?" Xander said, the latter statement directed towards Trip.

"I, uh, um stay away from me!" Trip screamed.

"Huh?"

"Nadria told me about that crush you have on me! Now it's not that I have anything against gay folks, it's just that they scare me. Especally those you have crushes on me."

"Ok, enough of this!" Xander said . "All of those stupid conclusions that you guys came too are retarded. The reason I want to seperate Lucas and Nadria is because Ransik asked me to. He doesn't fancy Lucas and want's his daughter to be with Trip." Xander said. "So we cut a deal in order for me to get out. I break up Nadria and Lucas and hook her up with Trip in exchange for my freedom. That was our deal." Xander said

"You damn backstabbin Scot!" Ransik said as he appeared from thin air. "You were to never speak of our deal!"

"I'm sorry, but this was just getting too odd for my taste!" Xander said.

"So," Lucas said as he walked up to Ransik "You disapprove of me eh?"

"Yeah I do." Ransik threw gritted teeth.

"Then how bout we settle this in the way of the saw?"

"Fine by me!" Ransik yelled.

Both men then pulled chainsaws from seemingly nowhere and began fighting with them.(Keep in mind, the chainsaws aren't turned on.)

"Hey cut that out! You almost hit me!" Z yelled

"Sorry Elizabeth!" Ransik and Lucas said like children.

"It's Z to you!!" she yelled

Ransik cowered in a corner and began crying while Lucas wet himself.

"For the love of Pete, grow a damn spine." Cam said.

"Can we please use the zords now?" Shane whined

"Sure Shawn." Jason said.

"Remind that if we ever do this again to make sure we get everyone name tags to avoid this problem." Trini said

"Allright guys, let's get in those zords!" Tommy said.

"Right!" The rangers said in unison as they morphed and poured into the zords.

Location: Pink Shawn Michaels zord

As everyone is taking a seat, Jen stops Mraz.

"Whoa whoa. What are you doing Sweetness?" Jen asked

"Taking my seat in the zord." everyone stared at him. "Oh come on girls, it's not someone was using this seat."

At that moment, Vida(the only one who was standing) made a very audible throat clearing sound. Saddened, Mraz got up and left the zord.

"Fine then! I'll just pilot this zord!" Mraz said as he entered the Flamingo-B.A.M. He then noticed that he had no clue had to control it. "...Can you help me use this?" he asked Hayley.

"Sure. It's not like I was doing anything important in this story. I mean, with Fairweather, Billy, Kendrix, Justin, Trip, Kat, and Bridge around, I'm just another run of the mill genius." Hayley let out a sigh.

"She seems sad." Mraz said

"Who cares?" Clare said. "I only actually mattered in about four episodes of my show, and you don't see me whining about it."

"Hell, I've never been relevant in anything and you don't see me fussin about it." Alpha said as over the B.A.M.'s communication screen.

"Please, you were just crying about that yesterday." Zordon Zero said.

"If I don't answer you that mean's you're not talking." Alpha said. Zordon Zero simply rolled his eyes.

Meanwhile, everyone jumped into there zords and prepared for battle.

"All right guys, let's show these pixies how we do things; ranger stlye!" Jason said

"Right!" was the collective answer as they charged the two zords.

20 minutes later.

Clapton and Billy Joel had disposed of and defeated the rangers with relative ease. One big reason was because Alpha had forgotten to install a megazord feature, and since he used some new technology that none of the other genius had ever seen, they were up the creek so to speak. All seemed lost until at roughly the same time, all the Mystic Force rangers(minus Chip) noticed the time.

"I got a plan!" Maddie exclaimed. "But I'll need everyone's help. Guys, I assume you know what to do right?"

"Right!" the other MFers(hehe) said. As usual, Chip was clueless.

"Ok, Kira and Danny, I need you to make sure the coffee in the zord is gone." Maddie said over there communicaters.

"Gotcha." Danny said as he went to pour out the coffee.

Moments later, (as soon as the clock struck 3:00) a very audible ding is heard. Chip then got up and went to the back of the zord.

"It shouldn't be long now!" Maddie said

"Oh shit! Where's the coffee?!" Chip screamed. He then began yelling into his communicater. "Vi! Gimme some of the coffee from you zord!"

"Sorry Chippers, but where out. I think those villians Clapton and Billy Joel stole all of it." Vida said.

"They did?! They'll die for there caffine related stealing!" Chip screamed as he left the room. He returned moments later dressed in a pair of black sweatpants, a black t-shirt with a wanted poster picture with his face on it in the center, a pair of leopard print boots, and a yellow flannel shirt. His hair is also now long and shaggy and he has an unkept beard.

"Oh my God! It's Cactuc Chip!" Xander screamed

"You darn right! I'll learn those damn musicians about stealing my coffee! And this lesson...is hardcore!" Chip said as he pulled out a large crate of weapons from seemingly nowhere. He then leapt into Clapton's zord, ready to dish out some hardcore justice.

"What the-?"

"Silence! You will feel my vengence!" Chip said as he reached into his crate. He then pulled out a sledgehammer covered in broken glass and smacked Clapton across the room. But before he could too far away, Chip wrapped a chain around his neck and pulled him back like a yoyo. He then took the sledgehammer and slowly rubbed it into Clapton's face. He then performed a hip toss off of the zord into a pile of nails, thumbtacks, glass, barbwire, and old needles that was put there by Vida before hand. Clapton sold the move like a pro, rolling around on the ground and even faking a seizure. Or maybe he wasn't faking...who cares? It's just Eric Clapton after all!

Chip then morphed into his Mystic Titan form and tossed Clapton's zord to the ground. He then pointed to Billy Joel, telling him that he was next. Billy Joel tryed to excape the zord but was cut off by Chip, who hit him across the face with a barbed wire covered boxing glove. He then removed the glove and started whipping Billy Joel across the back with the barbed wire. He then wrapped the wire around his hand and delivered a hardcore Mandible Claw to the muscial legend.

"Ouchies! Somebody call the dentist!" Conner said. he and the other rangers had relocated to the B.A.M. they carelessly tossed there wrestling legend zords into the pile where Clapton's zord was.

"Screw that, Chip thinks they stole his coffee. Some better call the morgue!"Darth Jenji said

Chip tossed the battered singer over his shoulder and once again turned to his Titan form. He kicked Billy Joel's zord over into the pile and set it ablaze with a thunderbolt. He then flew high into the air and turned back into his normal form. He used his elevaion to perform a devastating up-high piledriver into a pile of flaming zords! Cactus Chip! Cactuc Chip! Cactus Chip! Cactus Chip! Billy Joel just got piledriven straight to hell! He's a bloody mess! It's like a car-wreck down there! Um, sorry folks. I guess I channeled my inner Jim Ross just now.

The rangers all jumped from the inside of the B.A.M. and walked up to the battered villians.

"And now for the final touch!" Max said. "Pokeballs, go!" two Pokeballs then hit Clapton and Billy Joel, capturing them inside. "Yay! I caught a Billy Joel and an Eric Clapton!"

"Well guys, look's like everything here is as it should be." Kai said

"The villians are safely inside there pokeballs, we got our womanfolk back, and Cole got a new friend." Chad said

"This was quite the adventure." Mike said

"Lot of weird and awesome shit went down." Zack said

"Danny and Eric meet there children from the future." Carter said

"We got a glimpse into the sick sexual life of Kelsey and Ryan." Adam said

"Not to mention Karone and Zhane!" Carlos happily added.

"We meet some new rangers." Kelsey said as Udonna turned her back into her right age.

"I got a new set of parents." Nick said dryly. "I wonder who my real parents are."

"Udonna and Korragg are your parents. I thought I told you." Trip said.

"...Are you fuckin serious?" Nick asked. Trip nodded "Why? Why can't I have normal parents?? Most people get one set of crappy parents; I end up with three!!"

"It's not that bad" Maddie said.

"God hates me." Nick said sadly.

"But most importantly, I finally convinced Hayley, Kim and Kat to have that orgy with me!" Tommy said

"And when did this happen?" Hayley asked.

"...Dammit, I was so close!" Tommy said. "Guess it's back to the mountains for me.."

"Greetings rangers." Necrolai said as she appeared from nowhere.

"What do you want you wench?" Nick asked as he suddenly got his courage back. (Nothin like some action to get a red ranger going eh?)

"I actually came to see the faces of your comrades when I show them this!" Necrolai said as she pulled out a DVD. Shane, Hunter, Conner, Sky, Jack, and Nick all gasped.

"Where did you get that?" Sky yelled.

"P. Diddy gave it to me in exchange for letting him cut me over at Aslon's." the vampire then pulled out a DVD player and large screen TV. (Let's just say she pulled them from under her wing. Yeah let's go with that.) She put the DVD in and it began to play.

I won't bore you good people with the details of this video, but I will point out some of the higher points. These include a 'You Got Served' esqu dance off between a random guy and Conner, Sky hitting a Mariah Carey like high note, Shane breakdancing against a clown while the others stood in the background and did what I like to call the Magiranger dance.

The video ended as all the rangers were silent. That was until Billy fell to the floor in laughter. After a few seconds of looking at him, the other rangers followed suit. Hell, even Cole was laughing at them!

"Yep." Nick said. "God hates me."

Just then, Sky's SPD morpher began beeping.

"Tate here, is there anything wrong Commander?" Sky said into his morpher. Moments later, the voices of Sam, Doggie, Silverback, and the rest of SPD laughing came threw the morpher.

"Oh yeah, I sent a copy to the future Necrolai said.

"You know, this is really embarrassing." Sky said

"Yeah it is. Good thing we lack shame." Jack said

"Ain't that the truth." Sky responded as he put his arm around Jack in a freindly gesture. He then quickly removed it.

"All right guys we all should be heading home." Adam announced

"This was so much fun!" Claire said sadly. "I know! You guys should all come to Root Core for Thanksgiving this year!"

"That's sounds like fun." Conner said. "So, will it involve you and a bikini?" he said as winked at Claire.

Chip then appeared from nowhere and hit Conner about the head and neck with a cookie sheet. Apparently he was still in the Cactus Chip mind frame.

"She's my woman ya here? Bang bang bitch!" Chip said as he grabbed Claire under his arm. Claire then began giggling madly. "Somebody gimme some coffee!" Vida then handed him a mug of coffee.

"Yeah, Thanksgiving at Root Core sounds like fun." Dustin said

"We'll work out details later. Right now we need to get back home. I think a new episode of The Batman is on." Hunter said. Everyone agreed and boarded the B.A.S.S.

"Pilot, set a course for home!" Andross said. "Pilot?" he then noticed that Joel and Taylor were beating each over control of the ship. "This could take a while

The End...or is it? No really it's over...or am I tricking you?

Seriously though, I'm done.

A/N: Ok boys, girls, and trannies, that ends our chaotic journey that is the Missing duology. I would like to personally thank every single person that reviewed Missing or Missing: Part Deux. It's because of you that I kept writing this. I may not write again for a while because my school workload is piling up, but I can promise you one thing; One day(and that may never come) I will write a PR/Super Sentai crossover that will bring tears to your eyes(rather it be because it was good or because it hurt your eyes to read. I just like making people cry.) So until then, tip your waiters, support porn, and GO VIKES BABY!!!


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